


Emotions

by orphan_account



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Blow Jobs, Christmas, Explicit Language, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Jamilton have to work their feelings, M/M, Masturbation, Modern Era, New Year's Eve, New Years, Romance, Slow Burn, Smut, Some historical references
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-20
Updated: 2017-02-17
Packaged: 2018-09-10 16:41:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 26,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8924482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Life was always composed by emotions i felt
  
  Good or bad, they shaped the days
  
  Being the guides to my actions
  
  Being the way i saw the world 
   Until, one day, my emotions weren't the only ones affecting meBecause yours took place on meShaping my lifeShaping my heart-~-Basically, Jefferson is very alone on holidays, Lafayette tries to help, Angelica is the one everyone loves,  and Alex gets awkward (and eventually naked).





	1. The Invitation

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, first chapter of that fluffy-angst-porn thingy i'm trying to write. I hope you guys like it and let me say i'm sorry for any spelling mistakes in advance. Keep in mind english is not my first language and i still struggle with it sometimes.

The holiday season was coming closer and everyone seemed happy for the break from work they would have.

Everyone but Thomas Jefferson.

"What? But we always spend Christmas together James!" Jefferson said, following Madison down the hall

"I know Thomas but this time i can't. I'll go with Dolley visit her parents. You'll have to figure yourself out this year." Madison said, turning to pat gently Thomas' shoulder

Thomas stood there with his mouth open, seeing Madison walk away.

He huffed, crossing his arms like a kid. "I don't need you anyway..." he said to himself

***

Laurens entered Hamilton's office, being loud enough for the whole building to hear. He was wearing a Santa Claus' hat and beard and had something –probably paper– under his shirt, making him look fat.

"HO HO HO, WHO'S READY TO THE BEST CHRISTMAS EVER?"

"Oh my God, Laurens, what the fuck?" Alex asked, not being able to hold back a laugh

"I'm Santa Claus your little bastard, shut up." Lauren's said in a deep voice, raising his hand at Alex's direction to make him stop talking

"I'm sorry, we couldn't hold him." Mulligan showed at the door, together with Lafayette, who was looking kinda of scared

"Ok, Santa Claus, get out of my office i have work to do and Washington is coming here at any second, you won't want him to see you like this." Alexander stated, looking back at the papers in his hand

"Oh really? Maybe Mister Washington wants to sit on Santa's lap and ask for a present." Laurens kept the deep voice, moving his hands all over the place, making fun of the situation

"Laurens!" Washington's voice shouted from the door, making Laurens jump, letting paper fall from his shirt to the ground "What the hell is happening here?"

Hamilton rose his eyes from the papers, looking at Washington and Laurens, trying to hold a laugh.

"Nothing, sir." Lauren's voice now sounded like a little boy who was about to get grounded, making Mulligan laugh loudly while Lafayette just mumbled something like 'Americans...' and walked away from the room

***

Two days away from Christmas and people were getting in the mood. It was easy to see Santa's hats everywhere, some mistletoes hanging everywhere in the cafeteria that the workers had put there as a joke –one of them even hanging out of Washington's office door–, and beautiful Christmas lights hanging from here and there on the offices.

Thomas was just finishing a book in his spare time, while having a cup of coffee in his hand, in the cafeteria, when Hamilton, Laurens and Lafayette busted out of nowhere, screaming like crazy.

He rolled his eyes, knowing what the screaming was about. Their Christmas party that they couldn't stop talking for a second.

As they got closer, Thomas saw he was right. Their happy faces as they planned their party out loud made him groan out of frustration and look back at the book.

"If Lafayette don't drink a whole bottle of wine with a funnel I'm not going." Laurens said as he sat down on the table that stayed right beside Thomas

"Laurens, you are the one wanting to do that, you idiot." Lafayette commented

"No, my dear french friend, i want you to do it so i can finally see your ass drunk."

"But you want to do it too." it was Alexander's time to contest

"Yes, i do. But, you see, that's not the point!"

"Could you three loud pieces of shit go scream somewhere else?" Thomas said, not even looking at them

"Could you dumbass go read somewhere else?" Alexander answered, an angry expression on his face

"I got here first. And I'm talking both about the cafeteria and the country." Jefferson looked up, challenging Hamilton to another one of their fights

As Alexander opened his mouth to talk something, Lafayette sticked a bun that was left on the table on his mouth making him shut up.

"Could you two not fight at least once, _pour l'amour de Dieu_?"

Thomas just rolled his yes and went back to his book, hearing Alexander curse Lafayette for the bun.

"So, Thomas," Lafayette started, being the only one there that Jefferson accepted calling him by his first name "what are you doing this Chistmas?"

Thomas looked at him, unsure of what to say. He didn't wanted to tell him he was going to spend it alone in his house probably listening to loud music or watching TV.

"Not your business." Jefferson was short and clear, being a little ignorant with his friend, but that was normal when he got defensive over something

"Oh, what a jerk you are, Jefferson! Lafayette was polite while asking you!" Alexander almost shouted

Lafayette facepalmed himself, tired of his two friends fighting like this everytime, while Laurens only watched in silence.

"I'm not talking to you, Hamilton." Thomas mumbled placing his cup of coffee on the table and using both hands to support his head

"Yeah? But I'm talking to you. Why are you like this? You push everyone away from you. I don't even know how Lafayette got to be your friend in the beginning!"

Jefferson slammed his hands open on the table, making some of the coffee spill. His eyes were full of rage against Hamilton and he wanted to punch him in the face.

"Listen here, you bastart..." his voice were threatening. He wasn't in the mood for Hamilton that day "You don't dare to talk about me like you are flawless–"

"Never said i was." Hamilton interrupted

"You talk like you deserve better than me, what makes you so special?" Jefferson got up, standing by Alexander's side

Hamilton got up, keeping his expression controlled. He knew the more calm he showed himself, the more pissed Jefferson would become.

"I'm not an asshole like you."

In the back, Laurens made a confuse expression, wanting to point something out, but keeping it for himself.

Before Jefferson could strangle Hamilton in the cafeteria, Lafayette got up, pushing both of them away from eatch other.

"Stop that, both of you!" he said "I'm not here to watch you two fight like an old couple."

Jefferson got away from Lafayette's hand, taking his book from the table and walking away, not saying anything else.

Lafayette watched as he walked away, feeling worried about his friend, noticing Alexander get rid of his holding too.

"I still don't know how this jackass got Washington's trust to be his Secretary of State!"

"Alex, take it easy on him. Christmas is probably not an easy holiday for Jefferson. He's a lonely man." Lafayette said calmly

"Because he wants to!"

"Alex, come on." Laurens said, suddenly getting a serious tone while looking at his friend "Jefferson can't be that bad. You are being childish with those fights. Why do you hate him so much?"

"I don't hate him i just... Hate him!"

"Give him a break, _mon cher_."

***

Alexander was just about to leave the building when he noticed a light on the dark hallway of the offices. Who would be there so late working? Usually Alexander was the last one to leave.

He looked a little bit, noticing the light was coming from Jefferson's office and he roled his eyes, ready to leave.

Before he could give his first step away he heard Jefferson's voice, like he was talking to someone. Curious, he approached silently the open door and peeked inside, seeing the man with his head on his hand, the phone in his ear, looking upset.

No, not upset. He seemed more like he was disappointed, Alex noticed.

"Are you sure you can't leave it to next year?" his voice said, lazily, like knew it was meaningless "Ah, sure, you're already there..."

Thomas changed his expression, saddening all of the sudden, making Alex uncomfortable. Those expressions, the basic ones, were the ones he never got to see on Thomas' face. He had seen the other ones –like ambition, sarcasm, rage and focus– quite a lot, but never the basic ones. Happiness and sadness.

Seeing it now made him feel weird.

"Yeah, ok. Merry Christmas, Madison. Tell Dolley i said hi and wished a Merry Christmas for her too."

He hung up the phone, rubbing his face with his hands and falling back on his chair, looking at his own hands, that rested on his lap.

"Alone at Christmas..." Thomas thought out loud to himself, ignorant to the man who were watching through the crack on the door. "You reached rock bottom, Thomas. Congratulations."

***

Alexander spent his last day of work with Lafayette on his office, revising some documents Washington required before holidays. Both of them talked as minimum as possible, wanting to finish work as fast as they could, even though Alexander's mind was loud and full of questions that maybe the Frenchman would be able to answer.

The scene he saw last night wouldn't come out of his head. The sadness in Thomas' face seemed to be engraved on his brain, creeping on his thoughts, showing itself without warning.

Alex raised his head, looking at Lafayette, noticing how focused he was on his work. He opened his mouth a few times, trying to think on the perfect words.

"I found out why Jefferson got so evasive when you asked him about his plans for Christmas." he said, catching Lafayette's attention "He's going to spend it by himself, probably didn't wanted us to know."

Lafayette frowned, letting the papers and the laptop he was using aside, looking at Alexander.

"And how do you know that, Alex?" he asked, raising an eyebrow

"Ah, you know... I was leaving late yesterday and caught him talking in the phone with Madison about it." he said, awkwardly

Lafayette bit the interior of his mouth, looking away like he was thinking.

"We can invite him to the party." he mumbled to himself

"I'm sorry, what?"

"We can't just let Thomas be alone at Christmas! He's _mon ami_ just as you are, Alexander."

"I'm not letting Thomas Jefferson into my house."

"It's my house."

"Still! C'mon Laf, you know that it's a bad idea..."

Lafayette took a deep breath and looked at Hamilton like he was planning something, making Alex get uneasy.

"You're going to invite him." he said, simply

"What?! Have you gone crazy?"

"Alex, please. It's Christmas time. Do that for me. As a Christmas gift!"

The helpless expression on Lafayette's face made Alexander groan. He knew the Frenchman wouldn't stop bothering him until he agreed.

"Fine!" he put his hands in the air, getting pissed for what Lafayette was making him do "But don't you fucking expect a present under the tree then."

***

Hamilton walked to Jefferson's closed door for the fourth time in the space of 5 minutes. He was still trying to figure out what to say and wanting to just ignore what Lafayette asked him.

He was about to go into the office of his political enemy and invite him to a Christmas party that was first meant for only friends. It was a bad idea, and Alex knew that, but he couldn't say no to Lafayette.

That, and the fact that Thomas sad face was still bothering him.

It was worrying, to say the least, the way Alexander seemed to be affected by the memory of that particular expression of that particular person.

With a shake of his head he decided to just go in, invite Thomas, and wait for him to say no. He knocked on the door, hearing Jefferson's voice saying he could come in and he opened the door without ceremony, looking at Jefferson with a closed expression.

Jefferson frowned when he saw who was knocking, rolling his eyes and going back to look at his computer.

"Go away, Hamilton, I'm not in the mood for another of your fights. Whatever it is, i am innocent and it's probably your fault."

"I'm not here to fight."

The words brought Jefferson's attention to him, making him swallow the spit that was forming on his mouth.

"I'm here to invite you to our Christmas party."

Alexander crossed his arms, blinking way too much to be natural, and waited. Thomas was looking at him, not knowing exactly what to say, still chocked with the unexpected words that came out of Alexander's mouth.

"Are you drunk?"

Alexander's arms fell dramatically by his sides, while he looked at Jefferson like he was about to kill him.

"It was not my idea, Lafayette made me do it."

"Why?"

"Because i told him you would spend Christmas alone."

When Alexander noticed what he said he just stopped, his brain entering on a panic state. He had, yet again, talked too much.

"And how exactly you know that?" Jefferson asked, starting to rise from his chair

"I heard you on the phone yesterday..."

"You were spying on me?"

"No! I just–"

"Get out of my office."

"Jefferson, listen, i can't do that without you giving me a response."

"No, Alexander! I'm not going to your stupid party."

"Well, thank you. Have a nice day."

Alex got out of the room faster than he got in, not even bothering in closing the door on his way out.

When he made a turn, he saw Lafayette approaching. The Frenchman made a hopeful expression and Alex shrugged.

"I guess he enjoys being by himself."

"He declined?"

"Yup. Too bad. Now I'm going back to work."

"Alexander..." Lafayette stopped him before he could leave "Did you even try?"

"I did! He doesn't want to go."

Lafayette took a deep breath and looked right into Alexander's eyes, making him nervous.

"Come with me." he said before making his way to Jefferson's office himself

Alexander frowned, following Lafayette and stopping before Jefferson could see him.

"Thomas, _s'il vous plaît_ , come to the party..."

"Gilbert, look–"

"Please, don't 'Gilbert' me."

"I'm not going. First of all, they are your friends, not mine. Second of all, Alexander is not someone who i would spend Christmas with."

Alexander crossed his arms, containing the urge to just go in the room and fight Jefferson.

"Am i not your friend?" Lafayette asked, his voice seeming emotional

He was playing dirty, Alexander knew he was overreacting on purpose, to weaken Jefferson, and Thomas knew that too, but what he could do?

"I am, Laf. But they're not."

"I don't want you alone on Christmas, Thomas. I know you. You'll probably be wasted on Christmas morning because you'll be thinking of all crap that happened to you and will try to forget it by drinking."

Silence.

Alexander felt uneasy hearing the sudden silence in the room. The weight of it was too much.

"Please, _mon cher_ , just this time..."

Jefferson breathed out loud and Alexander could hear the noise his chair made when he rested his back on it.

"Fine. But don't expect me to be smiling all the time."

"Good. I'll tell the others." Lafayette turned to leave the room but stopped suddenly, already out the door, remembering something "Oh, and who's going to ride you over my house tomorrow will be Hamilton."

Alexander almost screamed, but he was occupied looking at Lafayette with his eyes wide open, like his mouth.

And, apparently, Jefferson had the same reaction, just with one difference: he screamed.

"Are you crazy? You must be out of your mind if you think I'm–"

"Thomas, i know your car is broken and you are taking the bus everyday to work. You can use a ride, and it'll be Alexander. I want both of you to talk, because i don't want fights on my Christmas." Lafayette said and waved his hand in the air as goodbye "See you tomorrow."


	2. The Party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are, a big fluffy chapter about my favorite Sin™ ship! Hope you guys like it, it was surely fun to write this one!

Alexander was driving to Thomas' apartment, feeling his hands sweat on the steering wheel. He tried to convince Lafayette that wasn't a good idea but the only thing he got was a bored look from the french and an "You are going anyways".

He arrived, seeing the big –and probably not cheap– building standing tall in the middle of the city. Hamilton got out of the car, taking a deep breath before he could go to the building concierge, receiving a weird look from the guy sitting there.

"I'm sorry, could you call Thomas Jefferson for me?"

The guy lazily took the phone, putting a random number on the digits and looking back at Alexander. "Name?"

"Hamilton."

He waited for someone to pick up, what took a while, making Hamilton curse Jefferson in his mind for making him wait so much when he could be already on Lafayette's.

When Thomas finally picked up the guy talked to him calmly, before hanging up the phone and looking with the most bored face Alexander had seen in his life.

"He said he's not ready and asked for you to get up to wait. The elevator is there. Roof." The guy said simply and Alexander kept looking at him while murdering Jefferson in his mind

He thought about declining and just waiting on the car, but he didn't know how ready Jefferson was so, if he got on his apartment, he could make Jefferson hurry up.

Hamilton made his way to the elevator, pressing the button to get on the roof, his mind in a rush. He needed to make a truce with Jefferson, at least for that night, so they wouldn't kill each other on Christmas night.

As the elevator made it's way up Alexander started to think a little more. Of course Jefferson would live on the roof. He was always trying to rub the amount of money he had in other people's face with the expensive clothes and cars and everything. Maybe he was even calling Alexander up just to show how much money he really had just by his apartment.

When the elevator finally stopped he found himself on a small hallway with only two doors. One of them were open and he tried his luck.

"Jefferson?" he screamed from outside the door

"Come in! Don't touch anything." He heard Jefferson's voice screaming inside the apartment and went in, searching for something to touch

"You should be ready already!"

"Oh, shut up! You came too early." Jefferson voice screamed from one of the rooms, probably

"I came at the exact hour you told me to come!"

"Yeah? Fine. Now wait there, I'll be ready in a second."

Hamilton took a deep breath and started looking around. The apartment was big but the decoration was oddly simple for a man like Jefferson. But, he noticed, even being simple, was a really nice house. The kitchen was in the same space of the living room, the smell of something sweet was coming from there.

Alexander sat down in the sofa, still looking around. There were a big hallway that probably led to the rooms and he could hear muffled sounds coming from one of them, probably Jefferson's.

"We're going to be late!" Alex screamed, not receiving any kind of answer

His phone buzzed in his pocket and he took it, seeing a new message. He unlocked it, seeing that Lafayette was the one who sent him the message and proceeded to read it.

"Alex, where are you two? Everyone is already here, and Thomas isn't answering my messages. Please, tell me you didn't kill him..."

Alexander huffed before answering, looking at the hour. They were already late.

Jefferson is getting ready. I didn't kill him, but I'm about to.

He put his phone back on his pocket and laid on the sofa, taking a deep breath, wondering how long Jefferson would be in his room getting ready.

"Can you hurry, please?"

"Can you take your feet out of my sofa?" Jefferson's voice said suddenly, scaring Alex

Hamilton sat ready to fight Jefferson for them being late, but was cut when he looked at him. Jefferson was still buttoning his shirt, letting his naked torso be seen. His eyes were hard on Alexander, still judging him for laying on his sofa.

Alexander closed his mouth and looked anywhere else. He could feel his cheeks turn red. His bisexuality was nothing he could deny, but he didn't thought that his sexuality could extend itself to the devil himself.

"Can we go now? Lafayette is already asking where we are."

Jefferson frowned, seeing Hamilton blush but ignoring it and going to the dining table, taking his phone from the table, noticing the 20 new messages.

"Sure, I'm almost ready." he said, making his way to the kitchen and leaving his phone behind, not opening none of the messages he knew was Lafayette's

Alex looked at him again, trying to see what he was going to do in the kitchen. Jefferson got to the oven, taking some cooking gloves on his way and taking a cake out of it.

Alexander now knew what the sweet scent was, and he was looking at the red and white cake with big eyes, feeling his mouth watering just by the smell and sight of it.

Jefferson carefully put the cake on a safe bowl where he could carry it without having the fear of letting it fall and placed it on the kitchen counter, getting back on making himself presentable.

"A cake?" Alex asked, still looking at the now almost hidden cake and wanting to get a bite of it

"Laf asked me to make one." Jefferson said shortly, looking himself on the hallway mirror

Alex took a moment to look at Jefferson better, seeing his face stuck in a hard expression, probably for talking to Hamilton.  And Alex knew that expression very well.

Again, the sad face of Jefferson appeared on his mind and he shook his head. Why that face was getting to him like that was something Hamilton wished to know.

He was taken away from his thoughts when Jefferson turned to him again, looking at him with a much softer expression.

"So... I guess we have to make a deal to not fight at least for tonight."

Jefferson looked uneasy, his voice was low and uncertain, like he didn't know exactly what to say. A truce between them was something new since they were always fighting. Alex himself moved himself uncomfortable on the couch, looking to his own feet.

"Yeah, i guess... If we fight tonight it's possible that Lafayette will kill us."

"No fighting?" Jefferson asked, putting his hand out to Alexander shake it

"No fighting." he got up to shake his hand and started walking to the door "We better get going, or Lafayette will kill us anyway."

"He surely will."

***

The silence seemed to be the worst part of the drive on the way to Lafayette's. Usually they would be screaming at each other, almost jumping on each other's throats. God, normally they wouldn't be even on the same car. But there they were: Alexander driving uncomfortably, trying not to look at Jefferson too much and Jefferson looking through the window while holding a giant cake on his hands.

Alexander swallowed, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel when they stopped at a red light. The silence were killing him slowly, and he needed to break it before he went mad, even knowing it would probably end up in a fight.

"So, what's the flavor?" Alexander asked, still looking ahead

Thomas turned his head to look at Alexander, confused, until he remembered the cake on his lap.

"Red velvet with chocolate." Jefferson said simply, uncomfortable himself

"Oh! Seems delicious. It surely smells good."

Alex finally looked over to Thomas, noticing his face holding a uncomfortable look. It was obvious it was uncomfortable. Both of them only talked to each other if to fight against different political views, or, better saying, different opinions on everything. A polite conversation was at least weird and completely new to them.

"Thank you." Jefferson said with a nod and went back looking at the car's window

That was it. It was everything Alexander could think of saying on that moment. The light turned green and he went back to driving, only being able to hear the sound of the car's heater and his own breathing.

When they finally arrived they could feel each other beginning to relax. Alex parked in the front of Lafayette's house and rushed to get out.

He walked to the sidewalk, looking at the house full of lights, completely decorated beautifully. Alexander smiled, remembering how excited Lafayette was to spend his Christmas in America for the first time, since he usually went back to France on holidays. He stopped smiling when he heard huffed sounds coming from behind, turning to see what it was, noticing Jefferson struggle to leave the car with the big cake in his hands. Hamilton approached quickly, taking the cake carefully from Thomas' hands, making Thomas get a little bit scared that the cake would fall to the ground.

"It's okay, give me so you can leave." Alex said in a soft tone he was sure he never used with Jefferson before

Thomas let him take the cake and got out of the car, closing the door and asking to get the cake back. Alexander gave it back and went to lock the car, while Jefferson started to walk towards the house.

"Thank you." he heard Thomad mumble as he walked by and swallowed again

This was the weirdest night of their lifes, no doubt.

They walked to the front door, hearing some music and voices coming from inside. Alex ringed the doorbell, Jefferson by his side holding the cake close to his chest.

Jefferson was nervous. He could feel his hands shaking while he held the cake closer to his chest. None of the people in there were his friends, the only exception being Lafayette. He couldn't be more uncomfortable. But he said he would come and he knew Lafayette was right when he said if he spent the night alone Thomas would end up wasted in the morning. Being alone wasn't something he didn't liked, but on holidays like that he ended up too emotional for his own good.

His thoughts were cut short when the door opened for them. Lafayette looked at both of them and smiled.

"Finally! I was getting worried!" He said, getting out of the way for them to go in "Thomas, mon cher, come with me. I'll show you where to put the cake. Alex, make yourself at home."

Alexander watched as Thomas were dragged to the kitchen and decided go to where his friends were, being welcomed with joyful screams.

***

The party went on for two hours now since they had arrived. Thomas spent most of the time in the kitchen with Lafayette, trying to ignore the people in the living room, but, of course, Lafayette needed to go see his other guests, and Thomas found himself alone again.

He had a glass of wine on his hand that Lafayette had kindly offered him, and he drank it quietly, wondering if wasn't better to just go home. He was surrounded by people but still alone on that kitchen, let alone with his own thoughts.

He shook his head and decided to go to the living room. He was invited and he would enjoy the party, even if it was by himself. He got out of the kitchen, going to the couch after taking more wine. He sat down and looked around, seeing people laughing and talking happily.

He suddenly felt the couch move and turned his head to see a woman sitting by his side. She held a glass like him, but hers were champagne, and she looked at him with a look Thomas could only consider dangerous. She seemed to se through his soul.

"You must be Thomas Jefferson." she said, softly, with a raised eyebrow

"And you are...?"

"Angelica. Angelica Schuyler. It's nice to meet you. Alexander talked a lot about you."

"He did?"

"Yes. He said you're a brainless prick who don't even know what you're talking most of the times." she stated before taking a sip of her champagne, while Thomas raised an eyebrow to her "But i prefer judge people by myself."

"Is that so?"

"Yes."

Thomas smiled, slightly uncomfortable but getting used to the chat.

"So, you're like, his girlfriend?"

Angelica looked at him like she was offended in some way and Jefferson wished he hadn't talked.

"No. I'm more like his big sister." she said, putting her glass on the center table in front of them "You don't have to worry, I'm no competition for you."

Thomas frowned. "What?"

"What?" she repeated, making a innocent face

Thomas raised an eyebrow at her and she just smiled at him, getting up and looking at him before walking away.

"Go enjoy the party, Jefferson!" she practically screamed before making her way to the group of friends close to where the alcohol were

***

Alexander was already half drunk when Lafayette decided to take the cake that Jefferson brought so everyone could get a slice of it. He sat close to Jefferson, who was reading some french book with a glass of wine in hands. His eyes were focused on the book and Alex couldn't help but admire the expression.

The peace between them were making Alexander start to notice a few things about Jefferson he hadn't before. Like the fact he likes to read. Now that Alexander stopped to think, he already saw Jefferson read a lot, but never stopped to give him credit for all that reading. Maybe that was the reason he was the only one capable to see "flaws" on Hamilton's plans where no one saw, even thou many times he was wrong.

Jefferson's focused face wasn't something he had concentrated on seeing also. He was frowning while reading every word in the book, his eyes running through the paragraphs fast and analyzing everything. His lips were closed on a straight line and he could notice his nose slightly crinkling. Another thing Alexander managed to notice was how beautiful Jefferson looked like this.

He shook his head, trying to understand where this thoughts came from. Maybe it was the drinks, he couldn't tell. He looked at his hands, noticing the slice of the red velvet cake untouched om his plate and decided to take a piece to taste it.

The moment Thomas saw that Alexander was about to eat his cake, he took his eyes out of his book, looking hopeful to Hamilton. When he tasted it, his eyes widened and Alex couldn't help himself but let go of a whine.

"This is so good!" he said, his mouth still full with cake

Jefferson raised his eyebrows and a little smile crossed his face, before going back to the book. For some reason, the fact that Hamilton liked something he made was good for him.

Or maybe it was just the wine, he couldn't tell.

Before Alexander could say something else about the flavor, Laurens started screaming from somewhere in the room.

"Guys, look! It's snowing!"

Everyone looked at him, seeing him looking at the window, the snow falling slowly on the outside. Lafayette was the first one to open the door that led to the backyard and go outside, being followed by the rest of the group.

Everyone were looking at the snow falling beautifully from the sky. Alexander gave a little smile seeing it and couldn't help but look around to see his friends faces, stopping at Jefferson's. He stood there, staring at Jefferson with a frown on his face. The expression on Thomas' face was one he never saw on him.

Alexander surely had seen Jefferson smile. Most of the times it was a sarcastic smile or a victorious one. But he was sure that he never saw this one. Thomas' smile were not big, but you could notice it easily on his lips, his eyes seemed to shine in the dark of the night and his face just seemed... Calm. Alex knew that expression would haunt his mind together with the sad one, but this one was way better. It made Alex warm up and he wanted to smile together with Jefferson and just keep looking at that expression till he couldn't anymore.

Happiness– that's what it was. It was the first time Alexander witnessed this feeling cross Jefferson's face, and he smiled at the thought of how a simple thing like snow brought Jefferson this emotion.

After a while, Alexander stopped staring, shaking his head and going through all of his thoughts. It wasn't right. His thoughts about Jefferson were always hateful and full of rage, but it took only a few hours of silence and awkward talk to Alex think those things. It was worrying him how much those simple expressions were getting through him. How those simple emotions were capable to fix Alexander's thoughts on Jefferson.

His thoughts were cut short when Laurens started running in the snow –open mouthed and completely drunk– trying to eat the snowflakes, and ended up hitting a trash bin next to the fence of the backyard. Everyone laughed at him while he just laid on the ground and started whining because of the pain.

***

The night passed by in a blink of an eye, and soon enough was already 4 in the morning and all of the guests started leaving.

Alexander was way sober now, since he had stopped drinking when he remembered he was driving home that night. The same couldn't be said about Jefferson.

He had way too many glasses of wine, making him dizzy and strangely happy. He went back to talk with Angelica, spending the night talking to her about everything. They ended up getting along, and Alex didn't know how to feel about that.

"I think i have to go. I need to take Eliza and Peggy home before they decide to sleep on Lafayette's couch." she said, giggling a little bit "But it was a pleasure to meet you, Thomas."

"My pleasure." he said, smiling at her and seeing her leave

Thomas walked into the kitchen, looking for more wine, finding some on the shelves and struggling to open it. When he finally got it open, he was scared by Lafayette entering the kitchen.

"Oh, God, there you are! Come on, Alexander is leaving already. You won't want to miss your ride home. The snow is getting thicker out there."

The frenchman started to pull Jefferson by the shirt, making him leave the wine behind, and leading him to the living room. Alexander was there, eyebrows raised with the scene of Lafayette pulling a drunk Jefferson being funny to him.

Lafayette stopped pulling him and placed Thomas close to where Alexander was standing. "Well, thanks for coming, both of you. I am very thankful that you guys didn't fight tonight."

Alexander gave him a little smile, pulling a drunk Jefferson by the wrist, both of them saying brief goodbyes to Lafayette and leaving the house.

They got to the car and Alexander didn't take long to start driving, going straight to Jefferson's house. The streets were empty –being 4:30 am on Christmas morning and snowing helped that happen. He drove silently, noticing Jefferson move on his seat abruptly sometimes.

The snow from early were still falling prettily on the outside, painting the town white, making Alexander remember Thomas' face, expressing the joy he hadn't seen on him yet. His thoughts were cut when Thomas' voice flooded his ears in the middle of the calming silence.

"I don't know how to feel about snow..."

"What?" Alexander asked, risking a fast look at the man by his side

Jefferson was looking at the streets full of a thin snow layer over it. He had a frown om his face, like the one he had while reading that book. He seemed to analyze every part of the snow.

"Snow. I don't know how to feel about it. It does look pretty, yes, but it's so destructive, isn't it? The beauty that destroys beauty. Flowers die for the snow to come and it looks beautiful but it's cold. It's too cold. That's the worst type of beauty." he said, his voice speaking every word slowly and carefully "The one that makes you like them to then destroy you slowly."

Alexander swallowed, parking at the front of Jefferson's apartment, trying to figure out where those words came from. Jefferson looked at the building and turned to Alexander, giving him a genuine smile, making Hamilton freeze on his seat.

"Thank you, Alexander. I had fun not fighting with you tonight. Good night. Or morning, i don't know." he said, giggling a little bit, drunk

He took his safety belt off and opened the door, shivering with the cold outside. Alexander just watched as Jefferson went to the building, dissappearing from his vision, but leaving his smile in his head, where Alex knew it wouldn't leave that easily.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, you guys can bet Alexander won't forget those smiles so easily. And also, yes, i know "they're already on the party? i thought that shit was going down because of the party!" *Vanessa's voice* nooooo no no no, no no nononono no no no no nononononon–(yes, this is an In The Heights reference cause i love that musical too, thanks), but shit is going down after the party, cause, as you guys could see, they are in peace right now and Alex is already starting to get confused about his feelings. 
> 
> You'll see where I'm going. 
> 
> Hope everyone liked it! xoxo  
> -~-
> 
> If you like that one you should try and read my friend's fic, which have the same prompt, but we wrote two different things with it. Here's the link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/8921956


	3. The Call

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK SO,,,,, BEFORE YOU START READING RIGHT AWAY, LET ME WARN YOU THAT THERE'S NSFW CONTENT ON THIS CHAPTER 
> 
> You're warned. 
> 
> I hope you guys like it!

Alexander couldn't sleep. He got home after leaving Jefferson and went straight to bed, feeling as tired as he ever been. But he couldn't keep his eyes closed without a certain smile crossing his mind.

He felt himself blushing at the memory of Jefferson's smile, making him curse himself for doing so and want to understand why he was feeling like this. It was just a smile, that was it. A happy smile. People used to have those sometimes, and, even that sometimes he wanted to disagree, Jefferson was a person.

But he couldn't stop thinking how the sight of that smile made him warm up inside. The genuine joy on his lips made Jefferson look somehow ethereal, making Alex wonder how that man could be so beautiful.

Alex shook his head, and curled himself on the bed, still in the clothes he used to the party. What was happening to him? He hated Jefferson...

_Didn't he?_

—

Jefferson started taking his shirt off, walking out of the bathroom. He had puked the alcohol he drank that night, and he felt his throat sore and hurt. He just needed some rest. But it was hard to get rest when the only thing that came on his mind was Alexander's face.

"Son of a bitch with those eyes..." Jefferson mumbled to himself, throwing his shirt on the hallway, going to his room, starting to take of his belt and pants "Trying to get me crazy..."

He remembered the way Alexander was looking at him when they were watching the snow begin to fall. He saw it when Alexander stared, but he didn't say anything. He liked the face he was making, his eyes wide and his mouth slightly open while admiring Thomas.

He laid on the bed and rubbed his hands on his face, the memory of Alexander like that sticking in his head, making him groan.

—

Alexander buried his face on the pillow. Yes, he hated Thomas Jefferson. He hated him from the bottom of his heart. He hated the way he always wanted to be right, even thou he was always wrong; He hated his attitude. He hated his dumb face, his voice, his _everything_.

... Didn't he?

He groaned, furious with the way he was acting like a teenager who was having a crush on a cute boy. But he definitely hadn't a crush on Thomas Jefferson. And Jefferson definitely wasn't cute.

At least that was what Alexander was telling himself as he started to analyze Thomas on his mind.

"Damn, he _is_ cute..." Alexander mumbled to himself, frowning right after "What the fuck am i saying? And why am I talking out loud?"

—

Thomas stopped to think, putting one arm over his eyes and resting the other one on his stomach. Thinking while drunk wasn't the best thing, but usually stop and think was a good way to organize his thoughts.

So, what he needed to think about? The list formed on his dizzy mind, and he analyzed the topics he had formed.

 _One –Why he was upset?_ The answer was simple: Hamilton. _Two –What Hamilton did to make him upset?_ That one were harder to answer. They hadn't fought and Hamilton kept polite the whole night, what was a surprise to him. The only thing he did was stare at him. So Jefferson got his answer: His eyes. The way they looked at Jefferson, almost calling him to keep looking into them and drown in their dark color.

Jefferson laughed, finding his own answer stupid. He was too drunk for that. But the third question seemed to glow on his mind, making him press his lips on a straight line.

_Three –What he could do to solve it?_

—

Alexander sat on the bed, taking his phone and looking for the Skype app. He was pissed at Thomas for no reason and he needed to fight him. Maybe that was it, he just needed a fight. At least he wanted to believe that. He wanted to belive that a few screams would do good for him. But he didn't have Jefferson's number, for good reasons, so Skype was the only option. He Skyped with Jefferson once since Washington needed to talk to both of them but couldn't reach them at the moment. Needless to say it ended up on a fight and Washington blocking both of them.

He found Jefferson's name, glad he hadn't erased it from the list, and clicked on it fast, not hesitating before making a call. He tapped his feet fast on the ground, getting anxious for no reason.

—

The noise coming from somewhere on the house made Jefferson leave his thoughts behind. He got up, searching for his ringing phone, noticing it was on the bathroom floor. Probably fell when he was puking.

Jefferson got it, seeing the Skype layout on the screen and Alexander's name in big letters while the sound kept going, making his annoyance even bigger.

He made a unhappy noise, going back to his room and dropping on the bed, deciding if it was a good idea to answer the call or not, giving in at some point, putting the phone on the speaker.

"What do you want, Hamilton?" he asked, grumpy

—

When Jefferson's voice echoed in his ears Hamilton stopped, making no sound whatsoever. He was there with the phone on his ear, completely still, trying to figure out what to say.

"Just wanted to say that you're the worst." Alexander said quickly, finding a million arguments in his mind to fight Jefferson, ignoring one of them being the fact that Jefferson's smile was beautiful on his face "You know what? This night without fighting made me think a lot and, God, you are such a prick, you know?"

—

Jefferson was looking at the ceiling with a frown while Alexander's screams kept coming out of his phone, filling his room. He was concentrating on his voice, not on what he was saying. To be honest, Jefferson had heard those same words coming out of Alexander's mouth so many times that he could see clearly in his head the way his mouth were moving while saying those words.

 _His mouth..._ The image of it made Jefferson move uncomfortably on his bed. He could see it clearly on his head and the thought of Alexander using that _God forsaken mouth_ for something else than scream at him made him feel the blood running to a inconvenient place for that moment.

He bit his lip as the answer to the third question came to him and quickly muted the call so Alexander wouldn't hear him but Jefferson could still hear his screams. He put the phone on the pillow beside him and slowly led his hands to touch the forming bulge on his underwear. He felt the air coming out of his lungs as he touched it softly through the fabric and closed his eyes.

Alexander was screaming so much that he didn't knew how his voice wasn't gone after all that, but he let him scream, concentrating in the sound of the voice hitting his ears, not caring to what he was saying at all. He pulled the underwear down, letting his dick free, touching it slightly, making soft noises of pleasure while imagining it was Alexander's hand.

He started to imagine more. What he would do to Hamilton if it was really him and not his cold hand around his cock? The image of his mouth came into his mind once again and he moaned loudly, stroking himself, imagining Alexander's lips around him, silently sucking him.

He was already completely hard at this point. Sweat already forming all over his body while he moved his hand, trying with all might to imagine it was Alexander there. The screams on the phone seemed non-stop and his voice were making Thomas moan loudly at every word. He let his mind do the job of picturing every little detail of his fantasy. He could see the clear image of Hamilton sucking him, but that was not enough. He wondered what more could happen, and that's when his moans became even more loud.

His hand was going faster as the image of himself throwing Hamilton on the bed and fucking him made its way through his mind. He pictured Alexander's face; Filled with pleasure and pleading for more as his loud mouth finally screamed a sound that Jefferson wasn't upset on hearing. He pictured his own face of delight for having him there, so vulnerable to him and ready to do what he wanted. He pictured his eyes, looking at him with that same shine on them he had last night while admiring him.

That was enough for Jefferson to shout out Alexander's name while he came, making a mess of himself. He kept stroking until he was completely finished, the imagery of Hamilton slowly fading on his mind. He opened his eyes, breathing with difficulty, trying to recover from the orgasm.

He suddenly noticed that Hamilton was still screaming. Whatever it was, Hamilton had a really long list of curses and causes to fight him, but he wasn't interested on it at all. He took the phone from the pillows, taking the call out of mute and rolled his eyes.

"Hamilton!" he said with authority, hearing the other man shut up "I'm really glad you called me to curse me and my descendents but it's almost 7 am and I am drunk and haven't slept at all, so, goodnight."

He finished the call, turning his phone off and throwing it around the room before going to clean himself up so he could get some rest.

—

Alexander was still holding the phone next to his ear, even though the call was ended. He said everything he thought he wanted to say to Jefferson but still wasn't satisfied.

He threw his phone on the mattress and laid down, looking at the ceiling, his mind going in a rush. It didn't take long for him to fall asleep, still having Jefferson on his mind.

***

Jefferson woke up with a bad headache and full of regrets. The memory of what he had done earlier was enough to make him disgusted with himself. Hamilton was his political enemy. The man he couldn't stop fighting with. But took only one day of not fighting for him to get off with Hamilton on his head.

He groaned as he stood up carefully and went to the kitchen, drinking some water, feeling his throat still a little hurt by the vomit. He went back to his room, taking his phone from the ground –thanking every entity alive that the screen wasn't broken– and turning it on, seeing the new messages on it.

He went to the living room and laid on the couch, noticing the snow falling lightly on the outside and thanking for the heater he had. He decided to open the messages, one of them being from Madison. It was a picture of him and Dolley with a present in hands that had Thomas' name on it, with the brief text under the picture saying _'Merry Christmas, Thomas! When I get back I'll give you your present.' Thomas smiled, wishing to be with the_ m. He knew if he was with them he wouldn't be suffering from _'Hamilton'_ –as he decided to call the situation. He took a deep breath before opening the rest of the messages.

There were one from Washington politely wishing him a merry Christmas with lots of digital Christmas cards under it and Thomas cringed at the animated ones. Sometimes were hard to remember he was the president. There was one from Lafayette talking about how glad he was to have him on his house and wishing him a merry Christmas too. A few other people had sent the same kind of Christmas-y messages, including Angelica, who had sent _'Hey crazy wine guy, merry Christmas and all.'_ and a picture of her wearing a Santa hat and one of her sisters –Eliza maybe– smiling widely while Angelica looked bored. That made him smile, knowing he had at least made a friend in the middle all of that mess was reassuring.

He just stopped when he saw a Skype message pop up on his phone all of the sudden. He clicked on it, noticing it was Hamilton's, making him groan. He blinked fast reading the sentence a few times, trying to understand why that simple phrase that he already had read lots of times made him warm up inside all of a sudden.

It only said _'Merry Christmas, Thomas.'_ and nothing else. He wondered if he should answer, his fingers hovering the keyboard of his phone for a while, before he decided to answer, typing the short message fast.

_'Merry Christmas, Alexander.'_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
> 
> Hope you guys liked it! <3 xoxo  
> -~-
> 
> Be sure to chek out my friend's fic! We used the same prompt but we have very different stories, and her story is amazing! Here's the link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/8921956


	4. The Realization

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a small one –basically a filler, but it's slightly important for the plot–, but i hope you guys enjoy it. Also, Merry Christmas! <3

Alexander woke up with a headache. He took his phone, still sleepy and fighting against the will of sleeping again. It was already 1 in the afternoon. He huffed at the time and sat on the bed slowly, putting the phone away and noticing he hadn't changed his clothes.

He walked to his bathroom, ready to take a bath, and looked at the mirror, widening his eyes at the face staring back. His hair was a mess, he looked paler than normal on the bathroom light, but at least the bags under his eyes were lighter after the nap.

Alexander needed to rest, and this week would be the best day to do so, since Washington had made clear he didn't wanted to see him till the next year. He wanted to work, but Washington said his work wasn't necessary this final week. It wasn't fair that Thomas would work and not him.

_Thomas..._

The name seemed to make his head hurt even more, making Alexander get upset. He couldn't keep himself from thinking about Jefferson for even one second, and that was making Alexander want to punch someone. He started taking off his clothes, going under the shower, and cursed out loud when the cold water hit his body.

He turned off the shower, cursing it while trembling from the cold and tried to get his hot water, noticing that the shower's heater had broken. Again.

He decided he had to take a shower anyway and did it, leaving the bathroom with shivers running down his spine. Alex didn't care he was still wet, going to his bed and taking the sheets, putting on his body, trying to get some heat from it. He closed his eyes, hugging the sheets close and curling himself into a ball, wishing he could have another way to get warm. Maybe another body.

Maybe Jefferson's body.

"Oh, for fuck's sake!" he screamed, moving fast on the bed to grab a pillow and use it as a way of warmth

He couldn't believe what his own mind were making him think. He shouldn't think that, especially about Jefferson. Alex took his phone again, still curled on the sheets, naked, still a bit wet for the shower, and tried to go through the texts he received. All of his friends had sent him a ' _Merry Christmas_ ' text and he had to answer them. He thought about writing a few texts as answers but he was too occupied trying to keep the will to send a text to Jefferson away from his mind.

He took a deep breath, seeing the Skype app in front of him, making him want to click on it and just send the message. But it would be very weird to say the least. The only time they were polite to each other were last night. But sending a Merry Christmas was just something normal, wasn't it? You didn't need to be friends to wish someone a Merry Christmas...

Alexander was making excuses, and he knew that, so he decided to send it already. He typed a simple ' _Merry Christmas, Thomas_ ' and stopped himself as he saw he used Jefferson's first name. He considered changing it but decided to leave it in.

Alex hugged his pillow closer, starting to feel his body warm up little by little. He felt his phone vibrate and saw a Skype message pop up and he felt the warmth he wanted fill his body when he saw that was Thomas' text, and he had wished him a merry christmas too, using his first name also. He kept looking at the ' _Alexander_ ' typed on the screen and hid his head on the pillow, feeling his cheeks blush.

That got Alex pissed and he threw everything away –except his phone–, getting up and fishing some clean clothes from the wardrobe, mumbling curses at himself for acting like this. He was a grown man and it was a shame for him to act like this.

But the memory of his name on the screen of the phone, coming from Jefferson, was enough to make him blush everytime he remembered it. That and the new memory of a smile who dared to haunt him every second. He was almost sure he was going crazy, his sanity had been gone and he should start to get treatment. He also knew he was being dramatic, but it was nothing he could stop.

He went to the kitchen, trying to find something to eat. Alexander knew that cereal for lunch wasn't the healthiest thing, but he wasn't in the mood to make food. He filled a bowl with cereal and milk and went to his couch, sitting down and turning the tv on just for the sake of breaking the silence. He thought better when there were noise around him.

What was happening to him was what he was trying to figure out. It was clear something was happening, but he didn't wanted to accept it. As he put a spoonful of cereal on his mouth and let his mind do its job, he started to think it was for the best accept his situation.

Deny that he was having a light crush on Jefferson would only cause him to have headaches and probably would cause him to kill someone because of the stress, so it was easier to accept the feeling.

No, not the feeling, he didn't wanted it to be that far. It was a thing. An inconvenient thing, he said to himself, but still a thing. He just couldn't believe that one day without fighting and a smile were enough to make him crush on Jefferson. But he figured it was more than that. Maybe the fact that he saw emotion on Jefferson –a thing Alex used to think he didn't had– helped. Alexander couldn't deny Jefferson was _something_. Even though he despised Jefferson he couldn't despite his looks. Jefferson was always well dressed –and his clothes always had made his body even more beautiful than it already was, but Hamilton wouldn't admit it–, he had composure –sometimes–, his intense eyes always had a power to give Alexander feelings, usually bad ones, and Hamilton now could put his smile on that small list; Hypnotizing and surely beautiful, ghosting through Alexander's head every possible time.

He huffed, looking at the bowl of cereal. He had a crush on Jefferson, and that was actually not comfortable, but what could he do?

His phone buzzed and he wouldn't admit it, but he wanted it to be Jefferson talking to him. He took it, slightly disappointed when he saw it was Laurens. The text was in all caps and Alexander snorted at how his best friend just demanded things of him. The text said ' _THE BAR CLOSE TO YOUR HOUSE. NOW. YOU'RE GOING TO PAY, I FORGOT MY WALLET AND I'M ALREADY ON MY WAY_.' and Alex just typed a fast 'okay' and left the unfinished cereal on the kitchen counter, going to his room to take warmer clothes.

After he was completely protected from the cold outside he left his place, starting to go down the stairs of the building and thought if was a good idea to tell John about his personal drama or keep it to himself. He decided to keep it as his little secret. It wasn't important at all, so he wouldn't bother to tell John that.

Alex left the building, seeing the streets covered in snow and thanked God for the snow not being too thick, leaving the streets clean enough for cars to pass by and people walk around. He walked calmly, smiling at the children playing with the snow on the sidewalks and the pretty view of it. It was cold as fuck, but at least it was beautiful.

Jefferson's words suddenly appeared on his mind and he thought about it, smiling and seeing that Thomas was right about the snow. It was beautiful but so cold. And, even so, Alex would stay in the cold, looking at it for as long as possible, just to absorb that beauty. He wondered if those words had any deeper meaning, but didn't tried to find it, arriving at the bar seeing Laurens in the distance, waving at him.

He waited for his friend in front of the bar, giving him a hug when he came closer and they went in, ready to get drunk on Christmas. Nothing he hadn't done before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts? Thanks for reading! 
> 
> -~-
> 
> Don't forget to check out my friend's fic! Here's the link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/8921956


	5. The Jealousy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys like this one! It's sincerely one of my favorites up until now.

" _In regards of this matter, the best solution to our Country is... Is..._ " Thomas growled hitting his head on the keyboard of his computer "Is me getting shot in the head."

It was the 27th of December, and he was back in office by Washington's command so he could finish his papers to a meeting with Washington himself about the international deals of the country. But there he was, no words were good enough to him get to the point he wanted, and he was getting pissed at himself.

He had 3 days to rest, but he never felt so tired in his life. The _thing_ that happened on Christmas morning was still haunting him, and it would be a lie to say he only touched himself with Alexander on his head once in that spare time. More of a lie was saying that he only did it while drunk.

It was humiliating, to say the least, and he couldn't thank Washington enough for making Alex take the rest of the month off. Thomas couldn't face him at any time soon, he was sure of that.

The Christmas message was the last time he had any kind of communication with Hamilton, and Jefferson felt like life was giving him a break for a while, not letting him deal with the shame of talking with his political enemy that he so loudly screamed the name while jerking off.

But it wasn't that easy to get rid of this situation. His mind was too busy shaming himself to work on convincing words to get his work done. He gave up on the essay for a while, taking his phone off of the table and opening his messages, going straight to Angelica's name.

He couldn't hold a little smile at the fact that he had made such a great friend in such a short amount of time. They've talked the night away on Christmas, only stopping when both of them decided that they needed to rest a little bit, and Thomas felt like he trusted Angelica, even knowing her for only 3 days.

He opened her chat and started typing, smiling while noticing the 'online' right under her name –that she insistently asked him to change to 'Angie'.

—Are you busy? I can't get my mind to work.

It wasn't long till the answer came, and Thomas got comfortable on his chair.

— _And talking to me is 'getting your mind to work'? Also, no, not busy._

 _—_ Since I can't work I thought about talking to you. You still owe me that story of the time Peggy confronted some robbers that got into your house.

— _You should try and work, Thomas Jefferson. The Secretary of State shouldn't be texting at work!_

—I have 2 days to get this ready, and I'm almost finished, so I guess I can let myself take a break.

— _If Washington fires you I don't want you whining to me about it._

And then she started typing the story, making Thomas smile yet again.

***

After almost two and a half hours talking to Angelica, Jefferson decided to get back to work. The chat had made him get less stressed with his whole situation and he was ready to finish the essay.

As he was typing the words that came to his mind on the computer he heard two knocks on his door and yelled to whoever was there to come in, taking his eyes off of the screen just to see Lafayette put his head into the room.

"Hey Gilbert." he said, going back to type more words

"Thomas, you've been locked in your office since early in the morning. Are you okay, _mon cher_?"

"Yes, Laf. I'm just working, that's it."

"You haven't got down to drink your coffee _once_."

"Maybe because I don't want coffee?"

"Thomas, you always drink coffee at least once in the day. At the same time every day."

"When you talk like this you sound like a creep."

Lafayette rolled his eyes and went behind Thomas' chair to look at the computer and Thomas raised an eyebrow at him.

"You've done enough. There's already seven pages on that essay, and I know you don't need to finish it today." Lafayette started, moving away from Thomas and taking his coat out of the wall, throwing at Thomas' face "Come. I'm going to that cafe nearby, and you're coming with me."

Jefferson rolled his eyes and crossed his arms on his chest. "What if i don't want to go?"

"I'll pay for your coffee."

"Going."

***

They walked in the snow to the cafe, not talking much. When they entered Thomas smiled at the smell of coffee in the room together with lots of other delicious foods, making his mouth fill with water. He hadn't noticed how hungry he was.

But his smile dissappeared when his eyes met the eyes of someone he wasn't expecting to see there. He tensed up immediately, as well as Hamilton when they saw each other.

Alexander was sitting on a table close to the window with a cup of coffee in hands. He had his eyes wide and locked on Thomas, trying to understand what he was doing there. The same could be said about Thomas.

"Ah, Alex, you're here already!" Lafayette said and Jefferson held back the will to kill the french

Lafayette sat down close to Alex and, with a deep breath, Thomas followed, sitting across him. "I thought it would be just us." he said, decapitating Lafayette in his mind

"Yeah, but since you and Hamilton got along so well on Christmas I though it would be a good idea to put you guys to talk. Who knows, maybe my two best friends end up getting along."

None of them said nothing, making Lafayette uncomfortable. An waitress came to get their orders and Thomas smiled at her seeing how much she blushed while talking to him. Alexander raised an eyebrow at that, moving uncomfortable and Lafayette just generally ignored their actions.

When the waitress tried to come with their orders, she almost dropped all of the coffee and food to the ground, but Thomas was fast enough to get it from her hands, making the poor girl get red in the face while he gave her one of his smirks and helped her to bring the food to the table. The waitress thanked Thomas and he played a gentleman, kissing her hand and making the girl walk away with her legs failing.

And between all that Alexander was sure that his cheek was bleeding inside of his mouth for the many times he bit into it to control himself from kicking the waitress out and ignoring the fact he was jealous. Of course he wouldn't admit it.

Lafayette started a conversation and Alex tried to keep his pace, noticing Thomas on his phone, smiling. He raised an eyebrow, suddenly feeling jealous of Thomas' phone –but he wouldn't admit it either. Thomas answered a few things Lafayette asked in the middle of the chat, both of them talking the less possible to each other, but it seemed that Laf was happy with the small amount of communication. It was something, at least.

Their food was almost finished when Lafayette got a text from Washington saying he needed his help.

"You two could try and talk... Just don't kill each other, please." that was what he said before leaving them alone

But there they were; Almost 5 minutes since Lafayette had left and no words were traded. Both of them sipping their coffees and Thomas concentrated on his phone, talking to someone –and _smiling_ at that said person's text. Alex tried to think of things to say. Maybe ask about work; He was still pissed for not being able to work, having to obey Washington's orders. Maybe he could know what was going on through Jefferson. But that wasn't exactly the topic he wanted to chat about. There was other things he wanted to know, like why he was such a son of a bitch but Alex still managed to have a crush on him.

But maybe that was too far. Instead he just decided to ask another thing that was bothering him.

"Who are you talking to?"

Alex voice was calm and collected, but his curiosity was easily seem in his tone. The sudden sound of Alexander's voice made Thomas look away from his phone, remembering Hamilton was still there.

"Angelica." he said simply and Alex frowned

"Schuyler?"

"Yes."

"Since when you two are friends?"

"Since the christmas party."

Alexander saw Thomas' attention go back to his phone as it buzzed with another message. He took a deep breath, not believing Angelica became friends with Jefferson. And, worst of all, was texting him while he was _with Alex_.

Hamilton got up of his seat, leaving his coffee behind and catching Jefferson's attention. "I'm going home." he said, dryly

"Suit yourself. But pay your fucking coffee first."

Alexander kinda growled, leaving some dollar bills on the table and walking away, leaving the cafe and starting to walk towards his car.

As he entered it, he took his phone out of his pocket, going to his messages and looking for Angelica's name, typing a message as fast as possible.

—Why the fuck are you friends with Thomas Jefferson?

He threw his phone on the passenger seat and started driving home, hearing his phone buzzing. For safety he would wait till he got home to see Angelica's answer, but he was curious.

After 10 torturing minutes of driving he finally parked his car on the parking lot of his building, taking his phone and seeing 3 new messages from Angelica. He opened the car's door and Angelica's texts at the same time, reading them fast.

_—One: How the fuck did you know I'm friends with him? I was about to ask Eliza if it was a good idea telling you about this!_

— _Two: He's a good guy, I like him. Has some pretty good jokes and writes pretty well too._

_—Three: Why do you care?_

Alexander almost hit a wall for looking at his phone instead of looking at where he was going. He entered the building, climbing the stairs and getting to his apartment, throwing himself on the ground, ready to list a million reasons to why she should keep distance from Jefferson –letting, of course, the 1.000.001 out of question, that being the fact he was jealous.

—Angie, he's an asshole, how can you befriends with him?

— _You're an asshole too, and here we are. But you still haven't answered how the fuck you found out._

—I was out on a cafe with him and Lafayette and he only had eyes to his phone. I simply asked him who he was texting and he said it was you.

— _Now you go to cafes with Thomas Jefferson? That's new._

—That's not the point. I don't like that friendship. Not one bit.

— _And who are you to tell me who should I be friends with?_

—He was smiling so much at his phone while talking to you... I don't like that.

Alex frowned as the "Read" symbol appeared and Angelica got offline all of the sudden. He was sure she would reply him about what he said but she didn't. He waited, seeing her get online and offline a million times before deciding to text her again.

—Aren't you going to answer anything?

Nothing. She read the text again but no answer. Alex started to get up, sitting with his phone still in hands.

—Are you talking to Jefferson and ignoring me?

Nothing.

The idea that he was being ignored again and that Jefferson was probably smiling at Angelica's texts made him angry. He had seem Thomas' joyful smile only three times now. One on Laf's party, thanks to the snow; One when he rode Thomas home; And one moments ago, thanks to _Angelica_. For some reason the third one wasn't making him warm up like the other two made. At least not in a good way. And the thought that this last one was the one that was probably on his face at that exact moment made Hamilton want to punch someone.

But he was _obviously_ not jealous.

He decided to try and grab Angelica's attention again.

—Angelica, for fucks sake, if you're talking to Jefferson and ignoring me I'm gonna scream.

Nothing.

—Angelica!

Read, but still nothing.

—I'll ask Peggy to drop-kick you!

Nothing.

—Stop ignoring me!

Read.

But nothing.

He huffed and threw his phone away, laying on the ground again and looking at the ceiling. He wanted to believe that he was like that only because he didn't trusted Jefferson with Angelica. She was one of his best friends and she always been a big sister to him. Even after the thing he had with Eliza not going anywhere, the friendship with the Schuyler sisters –especially with Angelica– stayed the same. He felt safe around Angelica, considering her family. And Jefferson was dangerous and an asshole. Alexander wanted to believe all of this was because he wanted to protect Angelica. But, deep down, he knew the truth.

Two truths, to be exact.

One: Angelica needed no protection. She could take care of herself better than any man or woman could.

Two: He was jealous.

The first truth he could accept, the second one, no. He had no right to get jealous over Jefferson and Angelica. All he had with Jefferson was a light crush that would probably go away at anytime. Get jealous of him wasn't an option.

His thoughts were cut by the sound of knocks in the door and he raised his head, frowning. He got up, wondering who could it be, and opened the door to see Angelica standing there with an angry expression on her face.

"Angelica?"

Before he could say anything else her hand pushed him out of the way and she entered the house, not saying a word. He closed the door and turned to look at her. As he opened his mouth, her hand slapped his face, making him open his eyes wide and look offended to Angelica who was now crossing her arms.

"What the fuck–"

"Shut up, Alexander. Seriously? You were asking me to stop talking with Thomas cause you're jealous?"

Alex swallowed, not knowing exactly what to say.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh no?" she asked and took her phone out of the pocket of her coat, walking around him while reading, like she was reading a poem "Quote:  _He was smiling so much at his phone while talking to you... I don't like that._ End quote."

She stopped walking, looking at Alexander with a pissed expression. "Should I tell who's the author of that or your brain decided to be smart for once?"

Hamilton crossed his arms. He didn't knew what to say, so he just decided to let Angelica do the talking.

"Don't play dumb, Alexander. I'm actually impressed by the fact you like Jefferson, but, seriously? You getting jealous over _me_?" he tried to open his mouth to say he wasn't jealous but she raised one hand at him "Don't you dare say you're not!"

He bit his lip and gave up. She was right and he knew that. He walked to the couch and sat down, defeated.

"Sorry."

Angelica's face softened and she sat beside him, hugging him and rolling her eyes.

"It's okay, Alex. Just don't be a dumbass."

He laughed and let himself be hugged, hugging her back.

"Since when you like Jefferson?"

"Christmas."

"Oh, I see."

"But it's not like I _like_ him, it's just a crush, you know?"

Angelica just let out a sarcastic ' _mhmm_ ' and Alex lightly hit her arm. "I'm serious!"

"Sure. Cause someone who have a " _light crush_ " texts their friends to stop talking with their crush cause they are jealous."

"Fuck you."

"I love you too, Alex." both of them smiled "So... I guess you idiot haven't told no one about that crush?"

"No."

"Not even Lafayette?"

"Why would I tell him?"

"Cause he's both your friend _and_ Jefferson's." she said, taking her phone and typing something "And because I'm telling him right now."

"WHAT?"

Alex got up real fast to take the phone away from Angelica but it was too late. The text had already been sent and he saw as the ' _online_ ' appeared under Laf's name and the Read symbol appeared.

Hamilton turned his head slowly towards Angelica, who was smiling like a perfect asshole. She took her phone back and saw as consecutive texts from Lafayette appeared on the screen.

"Now you have two friends who can help you with your _light crush._ "

"I hate you."

"Love you too, honey."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Angelica way too much I want to kiss her.  
> I aprecciate compliments and criticism on the comments, because, after all, I'm writing for you guys!   
> Thanks for reading!
> 
> -~-  
> Give me a shout on my tumblr! (http://wewroteourwayoutofboredom.tumblr.com/)
> 
> Make sure to read my friend's fic too! Here's the link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8921956
> 
> Have a good day! xoxo


	6. The Park

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG writer's block is awful.  
> Anyway, here's a long one and actually cute one (at some parts) for you guys.  
> (THANKS FOR MY FRIEND JAMIE WHO HELPED ME EDIT SOME PARTS OF THIS, LOVE YOU BABE)

Thomas felt his muscles tensing up and droplets of sweat fall from his forehead. He was _so close_ ; The noises coming from his mouth were the proof of that. Little whines and moans insisted to leave his lips as he moved his hand, his eyes were closed and his mind was working to get him the image he needed to have his release.

It didn't surprised him when he moaned Alexander's name while he came, making a mess of himself, but he still got mad at the fact it was Alexander's name. He took a moment to breathe, opening his eyes and looking at the ceiling, feeling the heat he was feeling fade slowly, leaving him cold. There wasn't another body there to keep him warm, it was just him in his bed and the guilty feeling that consumed him every time that happened.

But it was too late, and he knew that. The desire he was feeling towards Alexander wasn't normal.

He remembered last night, he managed to get the cafe waitress' number after Alexander left and charmed her till she agreed come to his house that night. It was a good idea, he thought; Have sex was the best way to get rid of that lust that was ghosting him. But afterwards he couldn't feel more uneasy for closing his eyes and picturing Hamilton there while the girl rode him. He came thinking of him and he couldn't stop himself to let his mind wonder if Alex woud too keep kissing his neck like the girl was doing when both of them were finished and trying to recover their strength.

Fortunately the girl said she had to leave that night still and he didn't have to deal with his shame for too long with she still on his sight.

He couldn't go to that cafe anymore, that was something he was sure of.

Thomas huffed, deciding to get up and clean himself, hearing his phone buzz on the bedside table. It was probably Angelica and he again felt the stress leave with the thought of a conversation with the woman. He was almost sure she was an angel send from God to take him out of his thoughts for a while.

He cleaned himself fast and took his phone, seeing he was right, it was Angelica. He laid on his bed, opening the texts quickly.

_—Tjeffs, are you busy?_

—I already told you to not call me that! And no, I'm not. I missed work today.

_—Tjeffs, you're such an irresponsible man! Do you even work?_

—You're so funy... What do you want, Schuyler?

— _Make you mad, but I already did it apparently, so this part is done._

—Fuck you.

— _Not today, darling. See, Lafayette and the other guys got out of work early today. We are all going to the park to throw snow at the French. Wanna come? Laf is asking for you too, not just me._

—It depends, who's "we"?

— _My sisters and I, the walking baguette, Laurens, Mulligan and Hamilton._

—Sorry, can't go.

— _What if Alexander doesn't go?_

—Then I can.

_—Omfg! Thomas Jefferson, you'll bring your ass to this park. You know you don't need to interact with Alex, right?_

—But he will be there and I'm not in the mood for that asshat today.

_—I will be there too. And so will Lafayette. And Peggy and Eliza are dying to meet you. Are you seriously missing that chance because of Hamilton?_

Jefferson didn't answer that one quickly. He stopped a little bit, trying to think if would be a good idea to go. With Hamilton so close to him again it would be even harder to contain the dark thoughts that roamed through his mind. But did he really wanted to stay away from Hamilton? Everything he had done until now showed he wanted the exact opposite; The desire of having Alexander _as close as possible_ made his body warm up suddenly and he had to take a deep breath to ignore those thoughts and felt the phone buzz on his hands again.

— _I know you read the text you motherfucker, answer me._

—Can you chill for a second? I'm thinking!

— _Didn't know you could do that._

—I'm considering blocking you.

— _Do that and I'll go to your house scream at your door._

—Please don't.

None of them sent anything after that, Jefferson was still wondering if it was a good idea or not, till a few seconds later the new text popped up on the chat.

— _Are you coming?_

He closed his eyes, knowing he would probably regret that decision.

—Yes.

***

When he finally finished dressing up to protect himself from the cold he sent Angelica a text to warn he was leaving.

The park that they chose to go was close to his home so he didn't wanted to waste gas on a five-minute-walk to the park. He got out of his house, took the elevator, and in one of the floors a kid walked inside, looking at him with curiosity. He looked at the little girl back, annoyed.

"What?"

"Your hair."

Jefferson opened his mouth, ready to drag that kid by the ear in the next floor to take her out of the elevator when she kept on talking.

"It's pretty! Can I touch it? My mom won't let my hair stay like this. She says it's too messy so she just keeps strai–" she stopped and frowned, trying to remember the word correctly "Straightening it. But yours looks so pretty!"

Thomas stopped for a moment, not knowing how to react. The little girl seemed innocent enough to be saying the truth, so he just got down on one knee and put his head down a little bit for the girl to reach his hair. She smiled widely and he felt her little hands touch his curls. He couldn't hold back a smile and suddenly felt his cheeks heat up.

He raised his head again and saw the big smile on the girl's face, making him smile back. He saw her smile drop a little as she touched her hair and looked at it, kinda disappointed.

"Maybe you could talk with your mother to stop straightening your hair." Thomas said with kindness in his voice "Or just wait till you age a little bit to let your hair go back to normal. Either way I know you would look amazing with any kind of hair."

He gave the little girl a wide smile and saw as she smiled back, feeling a sudden happiness inside of him for making that girl's day even a little bit better.

"Thank you, mister!" she hugged him, taking him by surprise but he only laughed and hugged the girl back

"You're welcome, little miss!"

He got up, messing a little with the girl's hair, making her giggle, and the doors of the elevator opened to the lounge. The girl ran out of the elevator, giving him a fast goodbye, and Thomas left it with a big smile on his face. If he was stressed, he couldn't tell. That little moment on the elevator was enough to lift his mood.

He left the building, seeing that a few snowflakes were falling, making him put his hoodie on so the snowflakes wouldn't stay on his hair while he walked.

Thomas started his walk to the park and looked around to see the white streets around him. That was when he remembered Alexander. More specifically, the night where he drove Thomas home. He remembered his words talking about snow, even being drunk. But the truth is that he wasn't talking _only_ about the snow.

He had spent the whole day without fighting Alexander and having little chats with him, and receiving those looks from him. That made him think of Alexander –and later desire him. He was amazed how Hamilton were attractive when he was not fighting Thomas. Not attractive only in his looks, but also in his words and actions. And, even drunk, he noticed how dangerous that was.

When Thomas talked about snow he was talking about Alexander too. The cold way he acts around Thomas but at the same time so attractive, the danger behind that beauty he carried. The way he made Thomas wish for him, even knowing that would probably cause damage to him. _More_ damage.

He was a damaged man, that was the truth. Wishing Alexander Hamilton was the same as wish more pain, he knew that.

He shook his head, getting angry at his own brain for those thoughts. All he felt was lust, and that was all. He was conscious that his sexuality extended itself to guys too, and just occurred to extend itself to _Alexander_. He wondered if Alex would accept laying with him just so he could stop thinking about him every time Thomas touched himself. But he made sure to ignore the thought when he turned on the corner of one street, seeing the park there, Alexander standing alone in front of it, looking annoyed.

He stopped for a moment, wondering why was Alexander alone and not with the rest of the group. He thought about going back and lying to Angelica but decided to confront the man and pretend he didn't imagined them fucking.

Just pretend.

When Alex saw him his eyes widened and Thomas thought seeing the man blush, but he let that aside, getting closer to him.

"Hey." he said, dryly

"Hey..."

"Where's everyone?"

"They'll arrive soon."

Thomas nodded and stood by Alexander's side, looking at him out of the corner of his eye. The short man was with a beanie, gloves, a scarf, a very thick coat, jeans and boots. His face was flushed because of the cold and Thomas couldn't hold a smile back. He was from the Caribbean, that kind of cold was probably a lot to him. But Thomas also noticed how beautiful he looked like this, making him blink a few times, looking away, trying to ignore those thoughts.

It didn't take long till the rest of the group arrived. Angelica walked to him with a big smile on her face and raised her arms for a hug that Thomas gladly gave her, having a smile on his own face.

"Tjeffs! It's so good to see you again, but less drunk."

"I will make you choke in snow if you don't stop calling me this."

"Didn't know you were into that kind of stuff."

"For fucks sake, woman..."

They both laughed and Lafayette got closer, hugging Jefferson by the side.

"And how's my dear friend going?" he said, still hugging him

"Pretty well, Gilbert."

"Don't call me Gilbert."

Eliza Schuyler got closer, together with Peggy, to talk to Jefferson and, after a few presentations, he discovered he enjoyed the presence of the Schuyler sisters, not only Angelica. They started walking on the park, Jefferson being surrounded by the Schuylers while they tried to ask him a million questions and Angelica just looking at him with a side smirk that he couldn't tell what it was, but made him feel uneasy.

After a while walking, Eliza and Peggy went to talk with the rest of the group and Angelica kept on walking by his side. He got surprised when she got his arm intertwined with hers and kept walking, staring a small conversation.

Behind them, Alexander felt his blood boil. Why was Angelica doing that in front of him? It was not fair that she got to touch him like that but he couldn't. That was what made Alexander even more frustrated; Was probably more likely for Jefferson to like Angelica than him, and that was why he was so jealous of them walking side by side, arms intertwined, close to each other, with Thomas giving her one of those happy little smiles that wouldn't leave Alex's mind.

Eliza noticed Alexander's saddening face and intertwined her arm on his, like Angelica was doing with Thomas, making Alex frown and look at her, curious.

"Don't worry, she's just talking to him and will try to bring the ' _You_ ' subject into the conversation. She told me her plan."

Alexander smiled at Eliza, seeing that she wanted to comfort him and looked back to the two walking in front of them. "She could do something less romantic, couldn't she?"

"Don't even worry about her, she won't admit it but she is in love with a family friend. The guy is pretty cool, you would love him."

Alexander smiled, still looking at Thomas and Angelica and feeling Eliza's arm on his. Why couldn't he fall in love with Eliza? It would be so much easier if, when they were dating, he actually felt more than a " _family love_ " for the girl by his side. He still remembers how the girl cried when they broke up. How Angelica wanted to kill him for a few days and how Peggy threw a shoe at his face at the very same day they broke up. He felt guilty but he couldn't fake his feelings for Eliza anymore; He loved her too much to do that. But after a few days everything was fine and they talked to each other –awkwardly– before gaining their friendship back. But there he was, suffering for someone he liked and probably wouldn't like him back.

Karma was a bitch.

He laid his head on Eliza's shoulder and she placed a little kiss on the top of his head, making him smile. She was too much for him, that was why it didn't work out. He had to fall for the worst man alive; His political enemy who was always against all he said. The man he did nothing but fight. He was some kind of sadistic son of a bitch, and he knew that very well.

Thomas was enjoying his talk with Angelica, as he always did –the only difference being that now he cold look at her while talking. They were getting to an open area on the park, where Angelica told him they were planning to throw snow at Lafayette and Alexander till they couldn't take it anymore, since they were the immigrants there. Thomas was quite excited for that.

Angelica laughed at something he said and took a deep breath, looking to nowhere before start talking again.

"So, I've been meaning to ask you something... Do you really _hate_ Alex?"

The question caught him off guard and he walked looking at his feet for a few seconds.

"No, I don't hate him. We're just opposites on work, but other than that I don't think I have motives to really hate him."

"You two should talk more, you have a lot in common."

"Like what?"

"You're both assholes."

"I'm going to throw you in the snow, lady."

"Yeah, yeah, good luck."

They laughed a little bit and Thomas looked behind, to see were the rest of the group was, noticing Alex with his head on Eliza's shoulder, making him frown. He stopped looking at them and his lips formed a straight line before he talked again.

"Alexander and Eliza are–"

"No." she cut him in the middle of the phrase, not even looking at him "They dated once, but, no. They are just really good friends."

"Why they don't date anymore?"

"Long story. But basically his heart wasn't hers. At least not as much as she wanted." Angelica got a bit sad all of the sudden, remembering the way her sister cried when they broke up "But they moved on. They are looking for the ones to give their hearts to."

Thomas gave her a simple " _hm_ " before noticing they got to the open area of the park. And, lucky them, it was completely covered in snow. He smirked, together with Angelica and they started to take amounts of snow in their hands, looking at each other before turning back and both choosing a target.

Thomas threw a snowball into Lafayette's face, making him stumble backwards and Angelica got Alexander right in the nose. It didn't take long for Laurens to scream " _DEATH TO THE FRENCH_ " and throw a snowball on Alexander's face, making him get mad.

"I'M NOT FRENCH!"

"SEE IF I CARE."

Then the snowball fight began, everyone around stopped to see the grown ass men and women playing in the snow in the middle of the park. Some laughed and some disapproved the action, but the group didn't care at all.

Alexander was trying to run from all the snow that was being thrown at him and couldn't help but look at Thomas, seeing him jump on Lafayette's back with snow on his hand and smak the snow on his face. But that wasn't the part that he was concentrated on. No, what he saw was the childish smile on his face while doing so –the way he laughed after Lafayette got rid of him. Alex stopped for a moment, just admiring him. He wished he could see that smile on Thomas's face more often, it made him even more beautiful. He blushed when he noticed Thomas looked back, his smile giving place to an expression he couldn't explain, his eyes so intense that made Alexander look away.

And Thomas saw the way Alex was looking at him. The same look he saw on Christmas Eve. The same look that insisted to creep on his mind a few times. That look distracted him enough for him to be not see Laurens running towards him while trying to escape an incredible agile Peggy. Laurens hit him with his whole body sending him to the ground. Thomas heard Angelica's laugh and when tried to get up he felt another thing hit him and he felt again, feeling another body fall over him. It didn't take long for him to see it was Alexander over him.

"Get off me, Hamilton!"

"I'm trying– JOHN, STOP THROWING SNOWBALLS YOU MOTHERFUCKER."

Laurens laughed seeing Alexander struggle to get up. When he finally got up he looked at Jefferson, putting his hand out to offer help. Thomas looked at him for a second and held his hand, getting up easily. The shorter man was way more strong than Thomas expected.

"Thanks." was all he could say

Hamilton nodded, this time visibly blushing, making Thomas frown. _Must be the cold_ , was what he said to himself. Then Laurens whistled loudly, making everyone look at him. He had an evil smirk on his lips and was looking at Thomas and Alex like he knew something they didn't.

"Tom and Alex, sitting in a tree–"

"Oh no..." Eliza mumbled behind Alexander

"K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" Lafayette, Peggy and Angelica now followed the mocking with Laurens while Thomas only rolled his eyes

He didn't see when Alex jumped on the man. When he noticed Laurens was on the ground and Alex was over him putting his head on the snow with an evil laugh. Thomas just stared, wide-eyed, starting to laugh because of the scene.

***

After an hour of playing in the snow or just generally talking to each other, everyone started to go home. Thomas bid goodbye to Angelica with a kiss on her hand, making Alexander want to drop-kick him. When everyone was already gone, both he and Hamilton started walking out of the park side by side, in silence.

Until Alexander sneeze.

The sound was so sudden and loud that made Jefferson jump and look at him, seeing Alex hug himself, probably cold. They kept walking and alexander sneezed a few more times before Jefferson started talking.

"How are you going home?"

Alexander frowned and looked at Jefferson, curious.

"I came here walking. Guess I'll walk home."

"You're going to get really sick if you do. You already look bad, to be honest."

Alexander looked at him, offended and Thomas took his time to laugh. "I mean that you already look sick, Alexander. Look, I live nearby. Let's walk to my house and I drive you home."

Thomas didn't know why he was doing that. Taking Alexander home was trespassing lots of boundaries, but there he was, offering it anyway. And Alexander seemed even more surprised, but he couldn't control a little smile to appear on his lips.

"Ok. Seems–" he sneezed "Seems good to me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yup.
> 
> -~-  
> Scream at me on Tumblr! ~> http://wewroteourwayoutofboredom.tumblr.com/
> 
> XOXO


	7. The Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SMUT SMUT SMUT

The walk to Thomas' house was silent. None of them said anything the whole way, the silence only being interrupted by the few cars that were passing by slowly due the snowy roads and Alexander's sneezes. The sun was already out of the sky and the street lights were on when they got to the building.

They got up on the elevator, still in silence, and Thomas felt his muscles tense. It was hard to not get nervous when he was taking Alex, of all people, home. The other man, in the other hand, was struggling to keep himself warm, rubbing his hands on his arms and with the scarf covering his mouth.

When they finally arrived on Thomas' apartment, Alex didn't wait for a formal invitation to get in and sit down on his couch, feeling the warm house help with the cold he was feeling. Thomas smiled and took off his coat, throwing anywhere, the movement getting Alexander's attention.

"I will make you something hot to drink." Jefferson said simply, already walking to the kitchen

But he stopped when Alex's voice spoke, the question hitting his ears and making him uncomfortable.

"Why are you being so nice?"

Alex's voice was low and seemed uncertain. Thomas could sense something else on his voice but he couldn't put his finger on what it was. He decided that was better if he gave an answer –standing in the middle of the living room, back turned to Alex, in complete silence didn't look like a good answer at all.

"I can be nice sometimes, you know?" he started to walk towards the kitchen again

"Well, thank you then." he heard Alex say but ignored it

He got to the kitchen, looking for the tea bags he had somewhere and put some water on a kettle, putting it on the stove. He found the tea he was looking for and put it on the counter, now waiting for the water to boil. He stood there, arms crossed, looking at the kettle, letting his mind work.

Alexander was on his couch at that exact moment, and that seemed to scare him to death. The fact that the man he had desired for a few days now was on his reach seemed to make his whole body hysterical. He could take Alex to his bed and finally have what he wanted, and maybe finally get rid of that blind lust that seemed to take control of him. But what if Alexander didn't want? He would look like a fool in front of him and that was something he wasn't prepared to do.

The noise of the water boiling in the kettle took him out of his thoughts, making him jump from the sudden noise. He took a deep breath and took the kettle out of the fire, taking one of his mugs from the cabinets, putting some hot water and the tea bag on it, walking to the living room.

"Here. I only had this kind of tea and I'm not crazy enough to give you coffee, so–"

He stopped talking when he looked at the couch, frowning a little before realizing what happened. He huffed and rolled his eyes at the sight of a sleeping-Alexander on his couch and put the cup of tea away. He stopped to look at Alex for a second, wondering if he should wake him up; The shorter man was curled into a ball on the couch, his head resting in one of the pillows and his mouth slightly open. His breath was slow and Thomas noticed how peaceful he looked like that.

Jefferson looked to the window, seeing it was already dark outside and the weather seemed to have gotten worse outside. No, it wasn't a good idea waking him up now. He shook his head, knowing he would regret his decision, going to the switches and turning off the lights, making the living room more comfortable for sleeping. He went to his room and took a blanket from there, going back to the living room and covering Alex with the blanket carefully.

Jefferson looked at Hamilton, frowning at his peaceful sleeping face and he took a deep breath. It would be a long night.

 

***

Alexander's eyes opened slowly, getting used to the slightly dark ambient he was. The first thing he noticed when he woke up was the blanket around him, keeping him warm together with the gentle warmth of the fireplace –because _of course_ Jefferson would have one. He sat down on the couch, still sleepy, and looked around, hugging the blanket around him.

The house was quiet and dark. The light coming from the giant balcony windows were not enough to light the living room, and the fire made ominous shades on the objects. The light sound of wood burning on the fireplace seemed to be the only sound around.

Alex got up, walking though the dark room with the blanket still around him. He went to the balcony window, seeing the snow covering the whole balcony outside in white. He looked around, finding a clock next to the fire place. 3:05am. Too late to go home now.

He thought about going back to the couch and sleeping the rest of the night, but the realization that Thomas wasn't around made him frown. He was probably sleeping in his own bed now, what would be totally normal, but Alex wanted to make sure. He walked through the dark hallway, stumbling on the blanket a few times, noticing an open door. There was light coming out of it, so he walked towards it. He got to the door, stopping there and looking inside, feeling his cheeks blush. That was, perhaps, the most domestic scene of Thomas Jefferson that Alexander had ever seem.Thomas was laying on his bed with only sweatpants and glasses on. A small lamp was placed by the bedside table, giving him enough lighting to read the book he had on his hands. His face was concentrated on the reading and Alex felt his heart beat faster. He felt stupid for looking for so long, Thomas not even noticing him standing on the door frame. He probably should turn back and just leave him alone, but he kept looking at Thomas like he was the most beautiful and intriguing painting he had ever seen.  


After a few seconds, Alexander moved towards the bed, Jefferson finally noticing him and frowning. Alexander said nothing, feeling himself blush for shame of what he was about to do. He climbed the bed, still with the blanket around him, and moved next to Thomas, laying his head in one of his arms and curling himself next to him, feeling the warmth of Thomas' body hit him. Meanwhile, Thomas just watched with wide eyes as the man laid on his bed, with the head on his arm, and just made himself comfortable. He didn't know how to breathe anymore. And before he could say something, Alexander's sleepy voice echoed on the empty room.

"What are you reading?"

Silence.

"I– uh..." Thomas stopped to clear his throat and take his glasses off "Divine Comedy."

Alex gazed at the book, suddenly interested. "Which part?"

"Inferno."

"Oh, cool! I like this book. I've read it three times already."

Thomas didn't answer. He didn't know what to answer to Alexander, who was way too close to him at that moment, in the middle of the night, in his _bed_. And Alex seemed to notice the way Thomas was uneasy, cause he ended up curling himself more in shame and closed his eyes, making a silent prayer for anyone who would listen to not let his acts spoil the way Thomas was treating him. But all Jefferson could do was try to stop his mind from thinking too much when he felt Alexander's body curl even more. He was _so close_. All he needed to do was move his hand and he would be able to touch Alexander the way he had been imagining.

Alex breathed out, taking Thomas' silence as a bad sign. He started to get up, feeling defeated. "Sorry, I didn't want to disturb you..."

As he was almost leaving the bed when Thomas' hand grabbed his wrist, making him look at his face. Slowly, Thomas sat down on the bed, not breaking the eye contactor the grip on his wrist, and Alexander noticed his eyes –they were dark with something that made his whole body tremble. _  
_

_Lust._

There it was, another emotion Alexander had never seen in Thomas' face, but that he was sure that would be in his mind forever. Thomas' eyes were dark, his face were serious, but with a light touch of uncertainty. But, other than that, utterly beautiful.

Thomas got close, saying nothing, and Alex's stomach ached with the feeling of anticipation. After not so long, Alexander felt his lips touch Thomas', an electric shock running through his whole body. He stopped breathing, his eyes fell shut, and he felt his body melt. Thomas' lips weren't doing anything but touch his gently, and when he broke the kiss, Alexander felt like he was drunk. His head was lighter and a small happiness started to grow on him. He opened his eyes, looking at Thomas, seeing him with eyes closed and lips pressed on a straight line. He seemed to be holding himself.

That was when Alexander looked at his pants, the bulge clearly forming on them. He widened his eyes, not being able to breathe right. For a moment, he just stayed there, not knowing what to do, but that moment was ushered away by the rush of confidence Alexander felt. He smirked and led his hand to touch one of Thomas's thighs, making him open his eyes and look at Alex, confused and surprised.

Alexander got closer again, catching his lips in another kiss and feeling Thomas' body tremble under his hand when he moved it closer to his crotch.

He broke the kiss, looking directly at Thomas' eyes when he finally touched his crotch, seeing as Thomas let out the air of his lungs quickly and closed his eyes.

"I have that effect on you?" he whispered, the smirk clear on his voice

Thomas only grunted as an answer and Alexander laughed, starting to move his hand through the bulge in his pants. He bit his lip, the view of Thomas being enough to get him half hard as well. He kissed Thomas again, pressing his hand a little bit more against Thomas and making him whimper on his lips.

"Do you want me?" Alexander asked, making Thomas open his eyes

Thomas' face seemed to change abruptly, something bordering rage shining behind his eyes, and, before Alex could do something, he felt his body being pushed towards the mattress. He felt a whine leave his mouth as Thomas' lips kissed his neck and his body hovered his, locking him in that position. He put his hands in Thomas' back, pressing him firmly against him, his fingers touching bare skin and feeling every movement of Thomas' muscles.

Jefferson left him, breathing heavily, and sat on the bed. Alex was ready to complain, but before he could say something, Thomas spoke.

"Take your clothes off. _All of it_."

The shiver that ran through Alexander's body was impossible to control. He cleared his throat, still not moving, looking at Thomas. The man narrowed his eyes and huffed, impatient. "Did I stutter?"

Alex blinked a few times, swallowing, feeling himself get interested in Thomas' demanding way. In any other day, in any other situation, Alex would fight him for dominance, but at that moment all he could do was obey. He got up of the bed slowly, his back turned to Thomas, and started taking out his coat.

"Look at _me_." he heard Thomas' voice say, and, again, he obeyed

He threw his coat to the ground, turning to look at Thomas' eyes. He started to unbuttom his shirt, seeing Jefferson following every movement he made. When he finished with the shirt, he threw it next to the coat, and moved to his pants. He saw as Jefferson licked his lips when he took the belt off, and started to take his pants off. When he was finally naked, he just stood there, not knowing what to do next. Thomas growled and moved to the edge of the bed.

"On your knees."

Alexander shivered but obeyed, slowly moving to kneel between Thomas' legs. He saw as Jefferson moved one of his hands to take a grip of his hair and the other one pushed his sweatpants down, letting his dick be seen. Alexander flushed and looked briefly at Thomas before moving closer and placing his lips on the tip of it, making Thomas moan. No orders were needed for Alex to know what he wanted.

He was amazed at the sounds Thomas was making while he teased him, his eyes were closed and his mouth open wide, letting little sounds of pleasure out. Alex closed his eyes and started bobbing his head up and down, taking Thomas' on his mouth without hesitation. Thomas fell on the bed, one hand gripping the sheets like he needed them to survive and the other one holding Alexander's hair, helping him move.

The sensations running through Jefferson's body were better than he ever imagined. His hand was nothing compared to Alexander's lips around him, compared to Alexander's hands holding his hips while sucking him. Compared to _Alexander_.

He started thrusting up into Alexander's mouth, making him stop his movements and just letting him fuck his mouth. Alexander moaned around him, the vibrations stimulating him even more, and his thrusts got faster and stronger. Thomas could feel Alex's throat everytime he thrusted up, and the feeling of it made him moan even more. He could feel himself getting close even just with that.

He took Alexander's mouth out of him, not wanting to end it so soon and he felt as Alex crawled over him, kissing him. His tongue invaded Alexander's mouth and he could _feel_ his taste on him. He was completely lost there, the moment being to surreal for him.

He broke the kiss and rolled with Alexander on the bed, hovering him again and finally taking off the sweatpants all the way, throwing them on the ground. Jefferson went back to kiss Alexander's neck, leaving little bites here and there, making Alex whine and laugh afterwards.

"For how long you wanted this, _Thomas_?"

Thomas stopped everything he was doing and Alex was afraid he had said something wrong. Jefferson moved to look at the other man's eyes and Alex saw the fire behind them when he gave him a devilish smile.

He moved a little bit, opening a drawer in the bedside table and taking out two things that Alex recognized immediately. It was a tube of lube and a condom. He didn't know how to breathe anymore.

Thomas moved down, between Alexander's legs and opened them a bit, looking at his body still with a smirk in his lips. He put a considerable amount of lube on his fingers and touched Alexander's hole lightly, making him shiver.

"You look beautiful from here, Alexander." Thomas looked at his eyes as he pushed a finger inside, making Alex bit his lower lip "All undressed and obedient... I could keep looking at you all night."

He started moving his finger and Alex moaned, closing his eyes and arching his back slightly. It didn't take long for a second finger –even a third– invade him, making him move his hips trying to find pleasure by buckling down them. Thomas stopped moving them and took them off Alex, making the later whine, missing the touch.

Quickly, Thomas put on the condom and positioned himself, holding Alexander's hips up. He looked at Alexander, trying to see if he would protest, but all he saw was his face filled with pleasure, making he start to move inside him.

Half way in, Alex held Thomas' wrist so he would stop. He had done that before, Thomas wasn't his first, but he could feel himself being split in half due the long time he hadn't laid with a man. Thomas stopped, suddenly worried.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, Yeah... Just– You're bigger than I actually expected." he said with a breathless laugh

Thomas swallowed, feeling the urge to move growing, but he couldn't hurt Alex. Nothing would justify hurting him like this. He wanted to burry himself completely on him and just end up with that lust once and for all, but he couldn't. Not when that would hurt Alex. So he waited, looking at Alexander's face, looking for any sign he should stop. The hand on his wrist was holding him strongly still, but he could feel Alex's thumb rubbing against his hand as an way to comfort him.

"K-Keep going."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. I just n-need to get used to your l-lenght."

Thomas took a deep breath and decided to trust him, moving slowly in, rolling his eyes up with the feeling and finally getting all the way. He felt his body shiver at the sensation of Alexander tight around him and his fingers pressed against the skin of his hips strongly. He looked at Alexander's face, noticing the pain in his face and a single tear rolling out of his closed eyes. He widened his eyes and got closer to him, pressing his body against Alexander's, trying his best to not move his hips. He kissed lightly Alex's lips and wiped the tear away, hearing the low whiny sounds coming from him. He didn't like to see that amount of pain on his face, he felt a little guilty.

"Hey, we can stop if–"

"No." Alexander opened his eyes, looking at Thomas. "Don't you d-dare. I just need... a little time. Could you give me a little time?"

Thomas nodded, moving his lips to place soft kisses on Alexander's flushed cheeks. He was going crazy with the fact that he was inside Alexander, but couldn't move. He would wait for Alexander to get used to him. He could wait.

After a few moments, he felt Alex's hips moving slightly taking a little moan out of him. He looked at his face, seeing Alex nod and lick his lips while moving his hips again, making Thomas' arms lose strength and almost fall over him.

He got back to his original position –kneeling on the bed, his hands holding Alexander's hips. He gave one last look at Alex before moving out of him slowly and thrusting back in, making both of them moan. Alex still felt a little pain, but it was way less than before, and the pleasure was speaking louder. Thomas started to thrust in and out a little faster, putting more strength into his thrusts. When he heard Alexander moan and saw him grab the bed sheets he lost it, starting to talk.

"Since Christmas. That's how long I've been wanting this." Alexander looked at him, and Thomas just went faster "I've been craving you so bad."

"You thought of m-me?"

"Yes."

" _Fuck–_ How often?"

"Everyday."

Alexander moaned at the answer, buckling his hips to meet Thomas' as he fucked him. The movement made Thomas hit the right spot and Alexander arched his back, making sure to move so Thomas would hit that spot again.

"There! _There_! Fuck– _Yes_!"

Thomas moaned. The feeling of Alexander was _too much_. He was so close that it actually was upsetting. He moved his hand to stroke Alexander, hearing him scream at the touch. He moved his hand as fast as he was moving his hips and it didn't take long for Alex to moan his name and cum all over himself and Thomas' hand. Without noticing, Alex tightened around him, making Thomas moan and let out a small whisper with Alexander's name on it when he finished, and thrusted a few times more before falling on the bed, beside Alex.

He closed his eyes, feeling sleepy. He just felt Alexander get close and hug his body before falling asleep.

 

***

Thomas woke up with the feeling of something rubbing his hand. He opened his eyes and saw Alexander in his boxers, rubbing a wet towel on his hand. Alex noticed him waking up and gave him a little smile, making Thomas frown at the warmth that took control of his body.

"Hey, good morning."

"What are you doing?"

"Well," Alex stopped cleaning his hand with the towel and laid over his body, placing a little kiss on Thomas' lips "I woke up early and decided that it was better cleaning up. So I cleaned myself from last night's _remains_ and thought in helping you. I mean, you slept with a condom full of cum, how comfortable is that?"

Alex chuckled a little bit and rested his head on the curve of his neck, rubbing his fingers on Thomas' chest. Neither of them said nothing; Alexander was enjoying the moment, feeling happy for being with Thomas. But Thomas just didn't know how to _react_. He finally got Alexander, and it was better than he expected, but sex was all he wanted right? He didn't want that "cute" morning moment that was happening, and the way that moment was making him feel scared him.

He tried to push Alexander out of him as gently as possible, making him frown at being pushed. Thomas sat on the bed, his lips dry and his throat seemed to hurt. "I think it's time for you to leave."

Alexander stopped, looking at Thomas' back, not understanding what happened. Thomas didn't dare to look at him. He couldn't. Alex moved closer, putting his hand on Thomas' shoulder.

"Thomas, what–"

"You head me." Thomas cut him off, moving his shoulder away, still not being able to look at Hamilton "Leave."

Alex tired to breathe with difficulty, and he felt his eyes getting full of tears. His chest was aching and he felt shame in being there. He felt his world turn upside down. He was sure he had Thomas, but, apparently, he was wrong.

"Did I do something wrong?" his voice was almost a whisper while he held back some tears

Thomas kept silent and Alexander stood up, taking his clothes from the ground and dressing up as fast as he could. Everything seemed to hurt in shame. When he was all dressed up he opened his mouth, trying to say something, but no words came out. Thomas didn't look at him once.  
Alex blinked a few times, before leaving the room, getting out of the house as fast as he could, forgetting his scarf and beanie on Thomas' living room.

He got to the elevator in silence, but when the doors closed, he felt the strength go away and tears rolled down his face. He felt like a fool. He gave himself for Thomas, believing and hoping Thomas would give himself as well. But there he was –crying on an elevator, feeling like an idiot for thinking Jefferson would feel the same. He felt _shame_ like never in his life.

When the door opened again he walked out as fast as he could, ignoring a little girl who looked at him strangely. He heard her voice talking to what he figured was his mother. ' _Why is this man crying?_ '. He was walking out of the building too fast to hear what the mother answered. Tears still rolling down his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys like it!
> 
> -~-  
> Shout at me on tumblr: http://wewroteourwayoutofboredom.tumblr.com/


	8. The Pain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay! There was too much happening at once in my life... But, hey, I'm back!  
> I know this is a short one but it's just meant for explanation and to prepare you guys for the next one!  
> And, by the way, the next one will be the last one, Emotions it's coming to a end.  
> I hope you guys enjoy this one!

The night was quiet that day. Most people traveled to be with their families due the ending of the year. Thomas' building was silent as ever, with just two or three apartments still with people, not counting his.

It was December 30th; Everyone was getting ready for the new year. Everyone but Thomas. He was standing in the living room, by the giant balcony windows, looking at the world outside with a glass of whisky in hands. The lights were off and the only light were the one coming from the fireplace.

Two days have passed since the day he had Alexander there and, at any second, he could free his mind of him. Everything that happened was glued to his mind, including the way Alexander was in the morning after –Warm, bright, _loving_.

He shook his head, taking another sip of whisky right after. He didn't want to think about that. Not again. He had what he wanted, and that was it. Thomas couldn't afford anything more than sex, and if Alex didn't understand that, it was his problem.

Jefferson lightly jumped when the intercom ringed, making him frown. He walked to it, hearing it ring once more.

"Yes?"

"Mr. Jefferson, there's someone here to see you."

"Who?"

"A sir named _Lanfayette_."

He heard someone talking loudly close to the intercom and recognized it as Lafayette trying to correct his name.

He moved the weight of his body from one foot to another. "Let him up."

"Ok, sir."

Thomas felt uneasy. What was Lafayette doing there at that hour? It wasn't too late or anything, but, with the weather, being home was the smartest thing to do. He sat at his couch, waiting for Laf and finishing his whisky. He could feel himself mildly drunk –a fuzziness taking control of his brain and thoughts and his muscles turning lighter, while the drink did its job of relaxing him.

It wasn't long until he heard the knocks on his door and got up to let Lafayette in. Thomas didn't know what to expect when he opened his door, but he surely didn't expect to see that amount of rage reflecting in the eyes of his friend. He frowned at Lafayette, and was caught by surprise by the strong push he gave him. Thomas stumbled backwards, trying not to fall to the ground, as Lafayette made his way into the house, closing the door behind him.

The next thing Thomas knew was that Lafayette was pointing his finger at Thomas' face and mumbling fast in french –half of the words being cuss words. After cursing Thomas and everything related to him, Lafayette took a deep breath, putting his hands on his hips and closing his eyes.

"Thomas–"

"Lafayette."

"Are you that big of an jerk? I don't believe you are but you made me question my opinion."

Thomas frowned, not understanding what was happening, making Lafayette put his hands in the air like he was tired of his shit.

"No one had seen or talked to Alexander in two days. When we decided to go to his house to see what happened, he was looking worse than he usually does. He hadn't eaten more than one bowl of cereal on those two days, and I'm not even going to talk about sleeping..."

Thomas tensed up, widening his eyes at the news of Alexander, but quickly putting a serious expression on his face. He didn't care at all.

At least he wanted to believe that.

"And why are you here?"

"Because he _told us_ , Thomas. He told us the big _idiot_ you were."

"It's not my fault if Alexander can't take rejection. I'm not looking for commitment, you know that very well."

There was silence and Thomas thought he had won that, but the silence was cut short by Lafayette's emotionless chuckle.

"You want to know what I know, Thomas?" he stepped closer "I know that behind that facade of yours, full of that– how do you say? –superiority, and 'elegance', is the real Thomas. A scared man, full of fears and uncertainty. Is not that you're not looking for commitment, _mon ami_ , you're scared of it."

Thomas didn't answer. Instead, he just stood there breathing fast and his eyes focused on Lafayette, who was standing tall in front of him. The frenchman's face were serious and seemed calm, but his eyes showed more than that.

"You can pretend as much as you want, but I know the truth. You made Alexander leave because you got scared of the way he treated you, didn't you? Since–" he stopped himself, hesitant, afraid that he would cross a line, but decided to keep talking, his voice softening "Since Martha died, you have been afraid."

Thomas felt the effect of the whisky leave him –his body suddenly turning heavier and heavier, pulling him to the ground. Her name seemed to cut him like a knife and he wanted to run away.

Thomas felt his eyes full of tears and didn't stop one of them from falling, running down his cheek.

"Don't–"

"You know it's _true_."

"AND WHAT IF IT IS?" Thomas screamed, losing control of himself, letting tears run down his face and feeling his chest hurt "WHAT IF IT'S TRUE? WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO?"

"Talk to Alex."

Thomas laughed out loud, turning his back to Lafayette and rubbing his hands on his face strongly. "I'm not going to talk to Alexander. And I think you should leave."

Lafayette crossed his arms. "I'm not leaving."

Thomas turned again, looking him in the face, his eyes full of rage. "This is my house–"

"And I don't give a fuck. Thomas, listen to me–"

"I've listened _enough_." he made his way to the door, opening it and looking at his own feet " _Leave_."

"You know what? Fine. I will leave. But only if you answer me this: What do you feel for Alexander?"

"Nothing. Now leave."

"Try again, but without lying this time."

The tears didn't seem to stop. Martha's memory and his own conflicted thoughts seemed to make his head ache. He closed the door again, making a loud noise, and punched the wood of it, wanting to let his frustration go through his fists.

"It doesn't _matter_ , can't you see?" he looked at Lafayette with his body all tensed up, his face completely wet in tears "It doesn't matter how I feel."

Lafayette looked at his friend, his eyes showing understanding. He, more than anyone, knew Thomas; He knew everything he went through, he knew his pain. He remembered the way Thomas was devastated when Martha died in front of him. The way that –after three weeks closed into his room– he kept taking long horseback rides around Monticello, not letting anyone go with him. It took him so much time to get his life back on track, and, even so, he was away. The Thomas that appeared after Martha's death seemed different, and Lafayette could see it clearly; The fire behind his eyes were different from the kind and warm that they used to be –it burned brighter, but not in a good way. The way he acted around people changed in a way that the Thomas he knew –the sweet Thomas Jefferson, always happily smiling– was a rare side of him, because the new Thomas Jefferson –a man ignorant and full of himself– was the one who took control.

And now, there he was, looking at his friend cry. Seeing the barriers he made to hide the old him crumble down and the vulnerable Thomas take control again. The fire on his eyes seemed so small, and Lafayette knew why.

He was _tired_.

Tired of living a life where everyone he loved was taken away from him by death. Tired of feeling like loving someone was wrong.

Lafayette got closer, hugging Thomas, feeling the man sob and his tears making the fabric of his jacket wet. "You need to stop with that though–"

"No."

"Thomas–"

" _No_! I _can't_. I loved my dad, and he was taken away from me. I loved my daughter, and when I had her in my arms, she was already gone. I loved my Martha, and she is _gone_." he said, his voice was low and he had to stop talking a few times to sob "Can't you see? _It. Doesn't. Matter._ "

The silence seemed heavy now. Lafayette couldn't speak, and held Thomas closer on his embrace. But he needed to help his friend it was all he knew on that moment. So he asked again, his voice softer:

"What do you feel for Alexander?"

Silence. Lafayette felt as Thomas tensed up once again and just waited. He needed to wait for Thomas to organize his thoughts, and it didn't take long before his voice echoed on his ears –low and shaky.

"I don't know..."

"How did him make you feel that morning?"

Another long silence.

" _Warm_."

"A good warm, I suppose?"

"Yes."

"Anything else?"

More silence. Thomas wandered through his thoughts for a moment, trying to understand his feelings that morning. He left Lafayette's arms and looked him in the face, his eyes red and his face showing his own confusion.

"Comfortable. He– He made me feel comfortable for a while." his voice seemed like a whisper now

Lafayette took a deep breath, smiling at Thomas. " _L'amour trouve un moyen de traverser la douleur._ "

Jefferson blinked a few times, trying to understand what he was saying –his brain was already too full to translate automatically. But when the words made sense on his mind, he felt more tears run through his face.

' _Love finds a way through the pain_ '

"What are you waiting? Go after him."

"This is ridiculous, Laf. No."

" _Pour le Dieu_ , Thomas! You have him! Why do you keep saying ' _no_ '?"

"What if it doesn't work? It's too uncertain!"

"And so is life, my friend." Lafayette said, impatient "Alexander likes you, and you like him. Can't you see that this is a new chance for you? To start over?"

Thomas kept silent, looking away from the frenchman's eyes. Lafayette noticed that, rolling his eyes.

"Do you think Martha would like this?" his voice were calm, like he was dealing with some scared animal "Look at you. This person you created as the new Thomas... It just ain't you. Give it a chance. Let Alexander see you. The real you! Let him have it, and take him as well. Both of you are damaged and need someone who can help."

"What if this just breaks me even more?" Thomas finally looked back at Lafayette, his eyes seemed to shine a little more, a small spark of hope going through them "Hamilton is dangerous territory, Laf. I don't know if I want to step on it."

"Well, I hate to say that but you already did."

"I can't take another heartbreak..."

"He likes you. A lot. He is crying for you right now. He needs you as you need him, Thomas."

Jefferson stopped for a moment and them moved quickly to the hallway of his house, entering his room. Lafayette took a deep breath almost certain that he had lost the argument. He sat on the sofa, putting his hands on his face, frustrated, until he heard steps and Thomas showed himself on the living room, dressed to protect himself from the cold. He had a beanie and a scarf on his hands that Lafayette recognized as Alex's, making him frown.

"Get up. I need a ride."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't kill me, I'm a dramatic bitch.


	9. The Promise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GOOD NEWS, THIS IS NOT THE LAST CHAPTER, THERE WILL BE AN EPILOGUE!!!!!!  
> But I hope you guys enjoy it <3

Thomas was looking through the window of Lafayette's car, watching the roads painted in white and how calm they were that night. Lafayette was driving in silence, but couldn't resist in taking his eyes off the road to look at Thomas a few times, wondering what he was going to do or say when they arrived at Alexander's. All he could see was Thomas holding Alex's beanie and scarf close to him, and that was enough for Lafayette to know he was nervous.

He parked in front of Alex's building, seeing Thomas looking at it with something resembling uncertainty before leaving the car.

Both of them walked to the building, getting to the stairs and Lafayette almost laughed at Thomas' face when he didn't find an elevator.

"He lives on the second floor, the building have only three. It doesn't need an elevator." he said shortly before climbing up the stairs

Thomas followed him, feeling his heart beat faster at each step. His hands held the pieces of clothing against his chest, wondering if his plan would work. He knew Alexander would be pissed at him, that was actually fairly normal, but he needed to change that. A small part of him was still saying that it was a bad idea, that he would end up hurt again, but he decided to ignore that.

He remembered the morning with Alexander, before the fear roll in. The way Alexander's eyes were shining while looking at him, the careful way he was cleaning him before he woke up, the way his small body felt warm. He could feel his body warm up just with those memories, and that was why he decided that, that night, he would give Alexander something he was hiding even from himself. And he was almost praying that it would work, and that Alexander would accept it.

He saw as Lafayette stopped walking and stopped himself when he saw the hallway to Alex's apartment and who was there. He was sure he would die that night.

The hallway wasn't that long and had four apartment doors. Standing on one of the doors was a woman he never saw on his life, but strangely looked a bit like Peggy, except for the killer look in her eyes –that was directed towards Thomas–, Angelica and Eliza. The three of them looked at him and Thomas gulped, feeling Lafayette pulling him towards them.

"Thomas Jefferson," Angelica said, getting closer to him "I could hit you in the face."

The three women were looking at him as if they were waiting for explanations. He felt himself almost hugging Alexander's clothes before talking.

"I'm sorry." his voice was low and he didn't dare to look at any of them "It's too complicated to explain, but I came here to fix things."

Angelica looked at Lafayette who promptly nodded to show he was telling the truth. Thomas raised his head, and pointed at the open door behind the girl he didn't know. "Is this Alex's house?"

He could see little inside the house, but, even so, the amount of papers around seemed like somewhere Alexander would live. The girl frowned and looked at him before chuckling.

"No. This is my house. I'm Alexander's neighbor." she put her hand out so Thomas could shake it "I'm Maria."

Thomas shook her hand and nodded as a response. Eliza moved behind Thomas, starting to push him gently by the shoulders.

"Come. You have a lot to talk to Alex and it's getting late." her voice was sweet and ended up calming Thomas a bit

She didn't seem to want to murder Thomas like all the others. Instead, she was being gentle and taking him to what he supposed was Alexander's door. She put him standing in front of the door and took her phone out. The curiosity got the best of him and he could see what she was doing.

She sent a text to Laurens, asking him to come outside, and Thomas frowned at her. Eliza simply smiled at him and gave him a little pat on the shoulder.

"It seems like you're the only one who's not mad at me." he said, still looking at her calm expression

She chuckled and looked at him. "I was mad at you. Angelica had to stop me from going to your house with Lafayette and kicking your ass. But you're here to talk to him, aren't you?"

Thomas stopped, still looking at her, confused.

"I mean, the way you are holding Alex's beanie and scarf... You are here to try to apologize and stay with him, aren't you?" Thomas nodded and saw as she smiled "Then there's no reason for me to be mad anymore."

Thomas smiled at her, making a mental note to talk to Eliza more in the future. The door opened suddenly, a sleepy Laurens showing himself. When he saw Thomas his face hardened, and he genuinely thought that Laurens would kill him on the spot.

It was weird seeing that –the angry Laurens–, and Thomas wished that he wouldn't need to see that ever again.

"What is he doing here?" he asked

"He came to talk to Alex, is he awake?"

"Liza, are you sure it's a good idea letting him talk to Alex?"

"I came to fix things and–"

"Shut up. No one asked you anything." Laurens said between gritted teeth and Thomas held back the urge to take a step back "Who the hell do you think you are?"

Eliza stepped onwards, touching Lauren's chest, trying to calm him.

"John, it's okay."

"Liza, what he did to Alex–"

"I know exactly what he did, John. But he came to talk. And he will do that _alone_."

"Liza..."

"Look," Thomas spoke, making both of them look at him "I know I was a dick. But it was never my intention to hurt him like that–"

"Great job then, asshole."

Thomas took a deep breath and looked at the ground. "I'm not here to pick a fight."

Laurens seemed reluctant but, after a few seconds, he huffed and went back inside, making Thomas frown. Eliza touched his arm gently. "Don't worry, he'll get over it. He's just very protective over Alex."

"Yeah, I can see that..."

After a few moments John showed at the door, dressed to leave and with a backpack on his right shoulder. Eliza got on her toes, giving Thomas a kiss on the cheek and saying a brief "good luck" before walking away. He was about to go into the apartment when he felt John's hand hold his arm. He stopped right away, looking at Laurens with a confused expression.

Laurens didn't even bothered to look at him but Thomas could see his face –an expression bordering rage, with his eyes burning in disgust for letting Thomas in.

"If you do anything to Alexander, you better never cross my path again."

Thomas just nodded and John let go of his arm, walking towards the group of friends that were about to head downstairs to leave. He looked at Lafayette briefly, seeing the French nod, quietly wishing him good luck. When everyone was finally gone he entered the house, closing the door behind him and getting ready for whatever could happen next.

***

Alexander frowned. John was taking too long to come back. He said he was going to talk to Eliza, but that was half an hour ago. Alex was already getting impatient with all the silence around him.

He had the TV on full volume on some game show he didn't care about, but talking to John was his best distraction. Half an hour with just an obnoxious game show playing on the background was enough to make him remember he was sad and full of shame.

He decided to get up, to see what John was doing that was taking so long when he noticed the smell of something cooking in the kitchen. A smile appeared on his lips when he smelled it.

John was cooking for him and would probably make him eat, even him refusing to. He wasn't hungry, but he knew his friend would be worried if he didn't eat, so he would give it a try.

After tying his hair in a bun he left the room. He was with an oversized shirt and sweat pants –not really something he could call _fashion_ , but it was comfortable–, he wasn't expecting no one that wasn't John to come over, so he didn't care about the way he was looking.

He arrived at the kitchen, ready to ask Laurens what he was cooking, until his words stopped on his throat when he saw someone that wasn't John. He couldn't believe when he saw Thomas' back while the said one seemed to be setting up the table for dinner.

Thomas turned slightly, jumping lightly when he noticed Alexander on the door frame. Both of them stayed in silence for a few moments, until Thomas tried to talk and Alexander cut his words.

"What are you doing here?"

Thomas gulped, his eyes looking at the ground, making Alexander frown. The look on Thomas' face seemed to unsettle Alex; His eyes were almost blurry with sadness and uncertainty. They were usually filled with a bright confident shimmer. His face seemed tired and his body seemed to be in a defenseless posture. Those little things made Alexander uncomfortable. That wasn't the Thomas he knew.

"I came here to talk but... I figured that you haven't had dinner, so I cooked something..."

Alexander blinked a few times. "Please, get out."

"Alexander–"

"Don't. Don't call me that, Jefferson."

"Please, just hear me out."

Alex walked away, going to his room and changing his clothes. If Thomas wasn't going to leave, he would. After putting some warm clothes he left the room, going straight to the front door, noticing his beanie and scarf –that he left at Thomas' apartment– laying on the couch. He shook his head, leaving the pieces of clothing behind and starting to open the door.

Before he could leave he felt Thomas' hand hold his wrist. He looked back, ready to yell at him, but he stopped when he saw Thomas' eyes. The scene made him stop breathing, feeling his heart drop. The amount of sadness on his eyes kept Alexander looking at them.

"Alex–"

" _Stop_ calling me that."

"Please, just let me talk. It's all I ask for."

He considered denying and just leaving him there, but he couldn't. Not when the fire on Thomas' eyes seemed to burn low, almost gone. He just couldn't.

He took his arm lightly out of Thomas' hand and took off his coat, making Thomas breathe out in relief. Alexander sat on the couch, crossing his arms, not daring to look at Thomas' eyes again or he would fall apart.

Thomas moved a little, in front of the door, trying to find the words that he had rehearsed in his own head, not being able to remember any of them. He would have to improvise.

"I came here to say that I'm sorry–"

"Of course you are." Alexander cut him, making Thomas pout

"I was an idiot, and I know that. And I am sorry. But I do need to explain myself so you know why I did that–"

"Seriously?" Alexander cut him again, this time looking at him dead in the eye "Are you going to pull the ' _it wasn't my fault, i didn't mean to_ ' card on me?"

Thomas frowned and Alex got out of the couch, walking at him and putting a finger on his chest, looking at his eyes.

"Stop now before I punch you in the face, Jefferson. Don't play the victim. You _wanted_ to do that and it _was_ your fault."

"I–"

"No! I don't want to hear. Forget it–"

"I DID THAT BECAUSE I WAS SCARED." Thomas' voice echoed through the empty house and Alex saw tears forming on his eyes "Can you shut up and _listen_ for a second? I was afraid of you and how you made me feel, you piece of shit. I've lost everyone I've loved once, and I got hurt more times you could count. I lost everything, and I'm not willing to lose anything else. But here I am! Trying to get you _asshat_ to listen to me while I try to apologize and explain myself to you. But apparently you can't stay quiet for even a _second_!"

Silence.

Both of them kept quiet for a few moments; Tears rolling down Thomas' face while Alex looked at him with wide eyes.

"You... Afraid?" Alexander whispered

Thomas huffed, taking Alexander's hand gently with his own. He held his hand, looking at it with the same sadness and uncertainty as before.

"I've been hurt before... I can't take another heartbreak. And all I have to offer you, Alexander, is _me_. The real me." Alexander kept looking at his face, hearing every word that was being said "I don't know if it's enough, but it's all I have; A broken man that needs fixing."

Thomas let go of Alex's hand, walking to the couch, sitting down and putting his head down, seeming truly tired. Alexander didn't know what to say. His heart was beating fast and his eyes were wide, looking at that new Thomas in front of him. It seemed so weird –seeing that part of Thomas.

After blinking a few times he walked slowly, getting on his knees in front of Thomas, who didn't even dare to look at him. He lifted his hand, holding Thomas' jaw and making him raise his head.

Alexander's eyes were shining, but Thomas couldn't say exactly what it was. That was a bit of uncertainty, mixed with a spark of hope and a bit of happiness.

"It's enough." Alexander said in a low voice, as if trying not to scare Thomas away

After a few seconds just staring at each other, Thomas leaned a bit to kiss Alexander's lips, feeling his body warm up with the act. He moved his hand to take a soft hold of Alex's cheek and rub his thumb on it gently.

It wasn't long till the kiss turned to be rough and Alex sat on Thomas' lap, taking a grip of his hair, while Thomas' hands held his waist, their mouths dancing together to a song that only they could hear.

Alex stopped the kiss to look at Thomas' eyes, noticing the lust behind them, together with something else, making a shiver run through his body. Thomas wanted him, and that made him smile.

"You are enough."

***

It was late and the snow was still falling outside. Alexander was awake, he couldn't sleep when he had Thomas by his side, sleeping calmly and holding him in his arms. He was making effort to look at Thomas' face in the dark –his calm expression while resting his head on the pillow, a few curls falling on his face, his lips lightly parted. He could look at Thomas like this forever, treating him like the most fascinating painting he had ever seen.

After a few minutes he watched as Thomas' eyelids flushed open. Alex kept staring, making Thomas smile and raise his hand to touch the other man's face. The small man held Thomas' hand in place, leaning a bit to place a little kiss on it. He felt like he was in heaven.

"Alex?" Thomas' low voice spoke, making him turn his eyes to look back at him

"Hm?"

"I need you to promise me one thing... Death took everyone from me, and I kept myself away from commitment, afraid that I would lose someone else." he made a pause, the silence of the night going back to the room, before he spoke again, a whisper in the dark "I can't lose you too..."

Alexander stopped for a few seconds, thinking. _Not dying_ wasn't something he could promise Thomas, that would be dumb of him, but he could hear the sadness behind his voice, so he began talking.

"I can't promise you that I will never die, or that I will be always here. But I _can_ promise to love you like it's the last day of my life everyday. I can't promise you forever, but I can promise you right now, and hope that it's enough for you."

"It is."

Alexander smiled and got closer, feeling Thomas' arms hold him against him. He could feel his chest moving as he breathed and the calm rhythm of his heart.

Alexander's smile grew wider while he closed his eyes. He was happy, and so was Thomas. The silence filled the room again, being only interrupted by their calm breaths and their hearts, beating together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :*  
> -~-  
> Shout at me on Tumblr! ~> http://wewroteourwayoutofboredom.tumblr.com


	10. The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WELL, LAST CHAPTER :///  
> I really hope all of you enjoyed this. I enjoyed writing it, but the important part is if y'all enjoyed read it!   
> Thank you for all the support on this story, I couldn't be more grateful! 
> 
> BTW I have a few projects of Hamilton fanfictions in mind, I don't know when I will post it, but I will!!!!

It was almost midnight, the new year was almost there. The snow fell lightly on the outside of Alex's apartment, painting the balcony in white.

Thomas had stayed the night and the whole day there with him, just talking to each other and doing sweet nothings. Thomas ended up cooking for Alex again, since he hadn't the chance to taste the delicious food he was preparing for him last night.

As the day passed, Alexander kept noticing the few barriers that Thomas had finally fall to the ground. He looked more relaxed than ever that night, as if he had nothing to worry about.

And now they were, sitting on the ground by the balcony with the glass doors closed, watching the snow falling and waiting for the new year. They were with thick sheets around them, a portable heater next to them, a few snaks and a bottle of cold champagne sitting there together with two fancy glasses –the only ones of the kind that Alex had. Thomas tried to open the bottle again but Alex took it from his hands.

"Can't you just wait? It's almost midnight!"

"I'm just trying to open it to get it ready."

"Yeah, sure."

Thomas snorted and rested his head on Alex's shoulder, making his hair tickle Alex's face a little bit.

Both of them smiled. The silence around them seemed comfortable, like they were safe there. Alexander made Jefferson leave his position and moved himself to sit at Jefferson's lap, getting comfortable there, while still looking at the balcony. Thomas roled his eyes and hugged Alex's body against his, resting his head on top of his shoulder.

"I like this..." Alex said suddenly

" _'This'_?"

"Yeah. Me and you. Right here. Like this. I like it."

Thomas remained silent for a few seconds.

"Me too." he said, in a low voice

Then, all of the sudden, fireworks started to blow outside the windows, lighting the sky. Alexander smiled and looked at Thomas's face. "Happy new year."

He stopped for a moment, looking at Thomas's eyes. He felt the air leave his lungs and his cheeks blush at the intensity of the look he was receiving.

And there it was; Another emotion Alex had never seen on Thomas's face. His eyes were shinning –partially for the fireworks outside, but there was another kind of light there–, his lips were curved in an almost invisible smile and his face in general seemed relaxed.

Alex liked that one. His favorite until that moment, and probably for the rest of his life.

 _Love_.

Thomas blinked a few times, as if trying to get back to reality, and smiled wide. "Happy new year, Alex."

Hamilton got closer, catching his lips on his own, feeling his heart beating faster. As they broke the kiss, Thomas gave a short laugh and raised an eyebrown at Alex.

"Now, can I open this thing?"

***  
 ** _2 DAYS LATER_**

"So, you and Hamilton–"

"Yeah."

"And it's, like, real?"

"Yes."

"But you hated him."

"Well, things change."

"It's been a _week_."

"Things change fast."

James Madison was standing on Jefferson's living room, looking at his friend, not believing him for even one second. He didn't expect to be back from Virginia and recieve the news that his best friend was dating their "worst enemy".

"Are you trying to prank me?"

"James!"

"Look, it's just... Very weird, ok?"

"Yes, I know, it's weird for me too sometimes."

"And you're okay?"

Thomas looked at him, noticing the protective tone behind his words. Madison, just as Lafayette, knew about Thomas' problems and how much baggage he carried on his back. It was normal that he got worried.

"Yes. As I wasn't for a long time."

Madison nodded, looking at the ground and thinking for a while, trying to get the idea of Hamilton and Thomas together.

"Well, in this case, congratulations." he said, giving him a reassuring smile "But, I guess I owe you a Christmas present!"

Thomas widened his eyes and moved slightly on his seat like a child. Madison took the box, that had been sitting by his side since he arrived, and handed it to Thomas.

He looked at the box, seeing his name on it and a little piece of folded paper, probably a message. He took it, opening it and reading the words. The calligraphy was Dolley's, and the little ' _Merry Christmas_ ' message written on it made him smile, wishing Dolley was there so he could hug her.

' _I wish you could have come with us, but, unfortunately, fate had other plans for these days. But I hope you remember we will always be back for you._

_I hope you like this gift, Tommy. But try not to get them banned from random places._

_Merry Christmas._

_James & Dolley Madison (But mostly Dolley)._'

Thomas moved his hands to unwrap the gift and laughed out loud when he saw what it was. There was a box of hand-made macaroons with different colors and a bottle of wine from Virginia there. Of course Dolley would send him those things.

"She insisted on making them. She knows you love those and keeps laughing when she remembers that snacks were banned because you couldn't stop eating macaroons."

"Remember me to thank her when I see her again."

***  
 _10 MONTHS LATER_

"No."

"Please?"

"Alex, Washington is here. I'm not going to sing a karaoke of a romantic-country song with you with the president of the United States in the room."

"Thomas, listen–"

"No."

"You didn't even know what I was going to say!"

"Still no."

Alexander pouted and crossed his arms. "Come on! It'll be fun!"

"Alex–"

"Thomas!"

Jefferson looked around. He knew Alexander enough to know that he would act extra about that for the rest of the night. He took a deep breath, silently cursing Washington for the choice of a bar that had karaoke.

"Fine, but just one song!"

Alexander's eyes shined and he opened a wide smile that made Thomas almost feel that all of the embarrassment would be worth it.

 _Almost_.

Alex pulled him by the hand to the karaoke machine, already picking a song, making Thomas frown.

" _Pink_?"

"Yeah, I like her."

"Of course you do."

Alexander narrowed his eyes, choosing a duet on the machine and getting ready to start to sing. He could hear the laughter coming from their friends, but he decided to only focus on Alexander's happiness for him accepting that. It was all that mattered.

***  
 _2 YEARS LATER_

"Thomas Jefferson, can you for fucks sake get ready faster? If we get to Angelica's wedding late she's going to smite us!"

"Can you calm down? I'm almost ready! What about you? Are you going to leave without shoes?"

Alexander frowned and looked at his feet, noticing that his shoes were missing. He ran through Thomas' house, searching for them while Thomas smiled, finishing getting ready.

He had hidden Alex's shoes so he would be too worried looking for them to bother him on getting ready fast.

As he finished, he could hear Alex's complaints, so he took the shoes out of his hiding spot and walked to the living room with them.

"Found 'em."

Alex took his shoes, sticking his feet inside as fast as he could. He dared a glance to Jefferson and felt his cheeks blush. Beautiful, as always.

"Ready?" Thomas asked

"Yeah, yeah..." Alex answered already running through the door

***

The wedding happened well, and the after party was going even better. All of the guests were having fun.

Alex dragged Thomas to talk to Angelica, who was surrounded by people. When they finally got to her she smiled wide at them, hugging them both.

"It's so good to see my boys here."

"I'm hppy for you, Angie." Thomas said, looking quickly at Angelica's husband "Mr. Church seem to be a nice man."

"Thank you, Tommy."

"Why do you insist on calling me this?"

"It's fun!" she said, patting on Thomas's shoulder "But, now, let's be serious. When will you two finally get married? It's been two years and you guys are still living apart!"

Both of them stopped for a moment, hearing that question. They looked at each other for a second before Alex opened his mouth to talk.

But, before he could say something, another person came to talk to Angelica, saving Alex's words.

***  
 _3 YEARS LATER_

The rain was strong outside and Alex felt like he was going to cry. He and Thomas had planned a amazing night, and everything was going okay until the rain started.

They thought it would stop fast, but it had been already two hours and nothing. For Alex, the night was ruined.

Thomas arrived on the living room with two plates of mac and cheese in his hands, putting them next to the couch, walking towards Alexander, noticing how sad he was.

"Hey, we can go tomorrow!"

"The restaurant won't be vacant tomorrow, Thomas! We've been planning this night for one week..."

"Yeah, I know." Thomas bit his lip "I had a way more romantic way to do that tonight, but I guess this will do..."

Alex looked at him, confused, seeing him take a little box of his pocket, and widening his eyes.

"Thomas–"

"Alexander Hamilton. You know, the first time we've met I thought you were a piece of shit. But, you know, that Christmas happened, and you ended up being my piece of shit–"

"Are you se–"

"Shut up and let me finish." he said, covering Alexander's mouth "And after three years together there's no doubt that I love you. And that I want to live the rest of my life with you. So, would you give me the honor to do that?" he said, getting down on one knee and showing him the ring "Will you marry me?"

Silence. Alexander felt like he couldn't breathe anymore, and Thomas got nervous. He treated the silence as a bad sign and was almost taking back all of it when Alex jumped onto him, hugging him.

"Yes." he whispered the answer "Yes, Thomas. Yes!"

Jefferson smiled, hugging him back, feeling as happy as he never felt. Alex was his, and he was Alex's. There was nothing more for him to ask.

He _was_ happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again, I love you all ❤

**Author's Note:**

> Is this good enouh?


End file.
